KENTUCKY

KERNEL

PAGICF.

then I began to got suspicious.
At!
the meeting nil the officers in turn
nrosc and gave us the same speech
only in different words, all being like
this:
MiM by
"Women students, upholders of the
atnmlnrds of the university, it grieves
us very much thnt some of you aren't
Time
for me to do n little
keeping the rules of course, most of
Here we have
them don't matter, they are put In crabbing myself.
for you folks
th0 book to fill up the paces, and so started a column
we can show visitors we have rules, to ir e t your complaints nircd
but this rule about automoblling is out in public, and after a spnsmodic
meant to be serious, not ornnniental. attempt at contributing, you get tired
LUCILE COOK
of the effort and slack up. Come on
spring wenther we lmvo occasionally. One of the girls in this assembly now, nnd jar loose. This column isn't
CAUGHT IN THE ACT
fifteen minutes in every 330 hours) (and we are looking right nt her)
my own edification.
just
It is for
What with every one coini? buzz ha i been caught out riding about 1) you, for I am merely the machine to
nnd
Well, there's xcrtninly plenty of ex- buzz, buzz, and all
the pitchers, big o'clock in the evening with n young keep It in order. Perhaps the name
citement nround this here enmpus. nnd little, having large hearing org pentlcman. To be more explicit, they
Perhaps, It's duo to the nice, wnrm ans, not to mention n certain nmiend were about three quarters of a mile is npt to give the wrong impression
pike, when the of the idea of the column. Don't think
age in their mouths, I've been about out Nicholasvillc
you have to do a lot of griping
as excited as girls used to get when county patrol turns them Lexington-war- d that your letters published.
What
because they claim the young to get
up.
SHOE SHOP they first put their hairany
mnn was driving with one hand, this column is for, is to give you a
However, I didn't do
Sherlock
while with the other, he held the chance to discuss pro nnd con, the
good and bad points of life. One rcg
ing, not even after .that women's young lady's hand."
convocation we had, but when they
ular contributor is doing his stuff.
When they got that far, I was so Here he is again. You go to your
hnd all us Pat hnll girls to n Wo
shocked I was about to leave. ImagAn
clnsscs so sleepy you're dense.
men's Student Government meeting.
ine being thnt far out a pike and
citrht o'clock class is a pest. You take
holding hands! Disgraceful, I calls
off your coat, lean back in your scat,
it.
and tlecide that you'll have some rest.
"In order to punish tno young lady," You go to sleep. No trouble at all.
went on the voice, "we are going to In fact it's almost a shame. You're
teach her not to act so unwisely again snoring away, and enjoying life, when
by "cailipusing" her for a month. Re
speaking your
you' hear someone
member, no mutter how glorious the name.
You ve heard your name,
n.oor, nor how thrillingly mysterious no doubt about that,
but it's the
the pike, or how enticing the evening professor's voice. He's speaking loud,
or the sport roadster, and no matter but you were asleep.
And still you
how attractive the man, don't go out heard the noise! Gosh! ain't it fierce?
automobiling or the goblins will (in
I can sympathize with the contrib
the form of the patrol) git you, If you
utor in his dilemma. I've been there,
Don't Watch Out!
Perhaps I wasn't snoring, but I was
Well, I left that meeting with a
surely asleep, and suddenly I awoke
firm resolve not to go driving even
to the" fact that Dr. Jennings had
with one of the Pilgrim fathers, and
I could toss
called on me. All
fact I tells Akkie as much, and at him was, "I didn'tthat understand
quite
adds what I think of a girl what
your question." I won't say what
would hold hands.
"Ain't it just his answer was.
awful," I says, "what's this genera
"Tell me, please, just what reason
tion coming to?"
Akkie said nothing.
She just sat there was fev that bloomin Prof, to
and looked funny. Was it Akkie? send his wife to give us a test when
Ye gods, it was Akkie!
Akkie, the he was sick and couldn't be there?
Why did he have to punish us because
one who held hands!
he had a light attack of indisposition?
oo
Was there any reason why we should'
'Dreams
Dear Son: How come you asked n't enjoy ourselves at such a time?
G. CRAMER,
me lor only twenty-hv- e
dollars .' I I see no other reason for sickness in
know that's not enough, so I'm doub the faculty than to give the poor,
(?) students a vacation
ling it
No, I don't want your fraternity once in a while. And the worst of it
he sent his wife. It wouldn't
pin. i have one man s pin ana one is was that
have been so much like rubbing it in
enough.
to an if he had gotten another instructor to
The registrar is pleased
do it for him, but to send his wife! I
nounce that a new system of registration has been devised whereby all red already have plans laid for his punishment. I think I will defer it until
tape is eliminated.
Shut the door, Jim, if the Prof. after this semester is over, though."
Now you see what one history stuhears the bell he'll stop talking and
we'd rather listen to him than go to dent thinks. I could say the same
thing for a certain education class,
lunch.
What of it if you are broke? It'f too, only the Prof, wasn't sick. He
not your money I want, dear, it's youv was out of town, so he had another instructor take the class, and we had
Boston Beanpot.
such a nice time discussing expendioo
tures, expenses, cost, and so on. And
She "Stop."
we worked the cutest little problem.
He "This is no boulevard."
Grrrrr.
Washington Dirge.
I'd really like to publish more than
two contributions in an issue, but if
you won't send in more than two, I
can't do it. Just get a little ambiLEXINGTON CLOAK tious, and write down some time
what you have to object to. It won't
& SUIT CO.
take but'a few minutes, and it will do
you a lot of good to get it off of your
343 W. MAIN
chest, and it will do me a lot of good
to get some more help for this column.
Several of the contributions have been
I
just periods in a long discourse.
J u s t unpacked a large
couldn't use them, because they were
shipment of Sport Dressabout something of which I knew
es. In all sizes at a low

tl.py lotting women
nn.
Ski.

THE CRAB SESSION

OIJIHREIk

THE CRAB

FOOD

'

DIXIE

ALL SHOES
$3

P. 0.

rtow?"-Mi-

into

i

r
Glas 1

Hox 21!)3

Correct
Student

'

DR. C. W. HIJRKE

nott'.ing.
So if you haven't scon your
own pet kick In horo, write It again!
more fully and I will be glad to use
it. Sign your nnmcs, so I enn get in
touch with you if there a something
which is riot quite clear,

108

:

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THE COLLEGE MAN AND NETTLETON SHOES

UNIVERSITY ORGANIZATIONS

No.040-JanC-

No. 041

ir

When You

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light-weigh-

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Sold locally b)

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Dealer Everywhere

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W. Alain St.

Opp. Court House

i
When the baseball nine wore whiskers,
and "Mob the Umpire" was the
national college yell, Anhcuser'Busch
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"ON THE CORNER"
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But wear stylish clothes
Use your own judgment.
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$30 to $45

GOLDBERG'S
'm

W. MAIN STREET

LYLE CROFT, PAUL JENKINS,
Loyal Van Arsdal, Campus Representatives

C

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iHkiigfy Eat

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A Refreshing Change

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Manager

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And now, when we laugh if we win
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We Have Everything.
If you don't see what you want see Jones.

BUSCH

Phone 9191

Ralph Jones, Prop.

(A--

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Best Gracje Leather Soles Sewed for $1.25
Goodyear Wing Foot Rubber Heels 50c

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PHONE 4 alp

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111

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Scientific j
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EYE

He "WhYit pororay did yu Join ? "
She "K. K
He (intcruflting)
"What!
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pays especial attention to '

V

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Registered OploWictrist

The Phoenix Hotel Co.

JOHN

i

the

Lexington

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a- -

*