Raised Rent, Rising Ire
Most landlords, when they increase
rents, do it from necessity higher
maintenance costs, rising overhead or
because the property has been improved. Not so with the University.
WTien the forthcoming rent hike
in Shawncctown was announced, a
dollar-for-dola- r
raise was also made for

Coopcrstown apartments. The reason?
So that rents in the latter housing
units would be kept in line with those
of Shawncctown.
apartSupposedly, Coopcrstown
ments are more desirable than those
of Shawneetown, not because they
are larger, have more closet space or
better furniture, but because of their
location. We doubt

closer-to-campu-

s

that their location is that important.
Most of the students living in both
projects are running on a shoestring
budget. One or both work. One or
both carry a full load of classwork.
If husband or wife is a veteran, the
GI check furnishes $135 of their
monthly income. Couples with children receive $25 more from the government. Sometimes, parents help meet

expenses. These people arc not in a
position to quibble over fractions of
a mile' in apartment locations, but
when they quibble over a SI raise or
over a $7 one, made simply because
the University believed the raise to
be to its own best interests, the com-

plaint is justified. The government
requested the Shawncctown hike nobody made any demands for Coopcrstown.
True, the students are not forced
by anyone to live in either of the
two developments. No one forced
them to get married, either. No one
forced them to have little Johnny or
Susie. Tor that matter, no one forced
them to attend the University.
But force does enter the picture-finan- cial
force. To avoid the heinous
situation of having a wider gap between the rent rates of the two projects, the University is forcing Coopers town residents to suffer for a
legitimate government demand which
logically should have affected only
residents of Shawneetown.
policy just doesn't
The
make sense.

How To Avoid Bruised Lips,
By HAP CAWOOD

gum-drum-niin-

lip-flippin-

g

g

molar-poundin-

jaw-pound-

tugs-of-wa-

asth-rnaticall-

head-dappin-

y,

at football games, or renting them in
small, medium, or magscrunchiously
private. Men would greet their kind with
bladed salutes.
The campus, would burst into a fingernail renaissance. Throngs of students
would abandon courtship and marriage
courses for handball. IFC could provide
music to orgy by.
fraternities hanfl-jivChi O and Tri Delt would petition for
a Finger Dexterity Derby. The faculty
would invest in glove stock before making
magnolious decisions. Kernel Kuties would
feature hairy hands. Art students would
throw tantrums with naked thumbs.
Cooperstown would order boxing gloves
by the gross. Donovan Hall would shatter
with typewriting. Manicure pamphlets
would be defamed as pornography.
Voluptuously innumerable changes.
And when the queen has reigned at
another intermission, lovers could walk
home, necking in a coat pocket, never
to quench the passion as did the stitch-lippe- d
freshman.
Or should they shake hands and feel
beyond reproach, they could leap behind the wall with eyes desirously dilated,
sensually discarding their Zorro rings,
entwining their fingers.
Heaven bursts with opal-firsongs as
the two, drowned in togetherness, clasp
their hands tightly . . . and arm wrestle.
sizes

e

e

g

overly-trenchan-

many-splendore-

lss-k.iss-kis-

d

s

e,

fi

lit

A

..

xL.V-&-

Kernel Montage By Jim Hampton

Cross My Heart, Gladys, I Only Had One Little Beer!"

The Readers5 Forum

keep-in-lin- e

The Decline Of Necking
With colleges so plagued with emotions contrary to their purjoses nowadays, it's no wonder that the
of kissing is a torment in itself,
.whether the Duel of Dentistry in a drive-i- n
around
theater or light
orners.
Notice, if you will, the complacently
tlectrified face of the freshman, staggered against the dorm wall with his first
date. Dazedly she rubs his Quill and
Scroll medallion. Soon they have progressed to
When he breaks up with the girl back
home, he will install his private love
system, which is but ecstatic rehearsals
of an unwritten play. Night after night
they go to Cyclops' to sip hot chocolate,
letting it acnetie upon their faces as they
sit under the blue moon,, or some such
thing, in an impetuous kissage. At 10:30
he is driving dormward with the
maiden welded to his side, murof the future, standing stalwartly
muring
before All Life to belch. Upon the last
blink, he departs with a phobia and
evening total of 587, his normal battering average.
Should the 587 spasms occur but several times, inasmuch as a child has his
third birthday but once, all would be
r
excusable. But the halitosic
continue until he whispers, most
things he regrets getting married, for example. He kisses so much he
degenerates its value. When he has
kissed her month after month, even his
words are superflous bores; the kisses have
dtleated their cause completely.
is that it
One excuse for
displays affection, yet the only human
Who has kissed. but once was Judas, who
t
certainly wasn't
or radiof
things. It is this
ant
honor that leaves the student, months thither, holding her us an
alcoholic holds a milk carton.
The tenderness associated with it is
undoubtedly measured on deceivingly
loaded scales, lest we consider the canni- balistic gentility of mauling teeth, ramming, knocking, slapping tonsils, or jamming jaws as if its ultimate goal were
avenging the mate's digestive track.
We must change. The Eskimo did
they rub noses. Think of their bliss with
a mere sinus congestion.
Our solution: Holding Hands.
With love so gripping and more sedu-tivODK. could triple scholarship funds
by Klling Hand Sacks rather than tags

KSL. V

A Suggested Memorial
To The Editpr:
I understand that a new chemistry
building is being planned, and is soon
to be erected. May I suggest that wc
students join to ask the Board of Trustees to name it in honor of the late
Dr. Charles Barkcnbus. Perhaps Student
Congress will take formal steps in that
direction.
Also, the February issue of The Kentucky Alumnus carries a notice that Dr.
A. J. Whitehouse, 381 South Limestone,
is receiving contributions to a Barkenbus
Fund. I am sure that many of us who
are former students of Dr. Barkenbus
would appreciate it if one of your reporters wolud interview Dr. Whitehouse
concerning this fund to see how it is to
be used, etc.

(Name Withheld)

Legislative Blackmail
To The Editor:
It apparently came as ro surprise to
those in athletic circles that Mississippi
State would decline the invitation to the
NCAA Tournament because of an established policy against participating in athletic events where the competing teams
include Negro players on their rosters.
Admittedly, racial integration is an
explosive issue in the Deep South, but
the manner in which the decision to
abort the tourney was made provides
an unfortunate commentary on the values
and philosophy which a university attempts to inculcate in its students. We
know little of the pressures to which
President Hilbun of Mississippi State was
subjected, but a pattern of legislative
blackmail appears in tha't several reports
Irom the state referred to the controlling
ol university appropriations by an election-minded
legislature. So in two areas
of public trust, the academic and the
political, expediency has been served.
The students of Mississippi State, who
voted in favor of participating in the
tournament, must be confused indeed by
the discrepancy between the ideas the
university represents and the double
standard pursued.
Again, integration is historically au
,

Intricate social and political issue and
there is no one answer or solution to
this enigma. North and South both have
made errors in attempts to effect a workable solution to this problem, and at the
same time both have made admirable
advances in attempting to seek an answer.
But it would appear that the nation and
society suffer when solutions to difficult
and complex social problems ate achieved
as they seemingly
were at Mississippi
State.
G force W.

Mallow

$82 For Some "Extras"
To The Editor:
would also like to voice my objections
to the rent increase on Coopcrstown
apartments. Three years ago the management assured the residents that their tent
would be lowered as the loan was repaid. Since then wc have had one increase and another is now proposed.
For the same
apartment
for which we used to pay $72.50, we arc
now expected to pay $8. This seems a
little bit out of line considering it h.is
had three years use' and no repair. The
paint in die bathroom is peeling and
the plaster is coming olf and for these
"extras"-am expected to pay $7 more.
It would seem to me that a University
housing project would try. to consider a
married student's budget and income and
try to provide him a decent place to live
at a price he can afford. Of course, a rent
raise will help the University get rid of
its long waiting list.
Living conditions in the project are
as good as can be expected with so many
living so close. But who wants to pay
$82 to use washing machines, dryers and
clothes lines with approximately 50 other
families; to face all the problems ol rearing children in a place where everyone
feels differently about discipline; to live
with those who" have no children and
can't fully understand our problems; to
have no place to park one's car? These
problems can be worked out with a lot
of wear and tear on one's patience, but
for $82 I'd juM as soon give them 30
da)s notice and get avay from all of it.
1

one-bedroo-

Mrs. Rum 1rh:man

The Kentucky Kernel
Eitfd

University of Kentucky

at the Tost Office at Lexington Kentucky as second clasj matter und- -r th Act of
Published four tl.net a week during the regular hool year ractpt Holiday I arid
SIX DOLLARS A SCHOOL YEAR

Jim Hampton,

Editor-in-Chi-

el. it? 3.

187.

ef

Bnx Neuuhk, Chief News Editor
Labry Van Hoosr, Chief Sports Fditcr
Billie Rose Paxton, Society Editor
Perhy Ashiey, Business Manager
Norman McMulun, Advertising Manager
Cordon Bauc, Staff Photographer
Hank Chapman, Cartoonist
THURSDAY'S NEWS STAFF
Jamics Nolan, Associate Editor

Alice Redoinc, Editor

Paul Scott,

Sports Editor

*