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THE KENTUCKY

PAGE FOUR
man! Why don't ypu get a horse
and a mask?"
And incidentally a brand new
Itcna was seen with the gentleman
Sunday afternoon. A Kappa I

Sneers

Us
During vacation we decided that
wc were wasting our time and our
talent in spading up the dirt for
the tiers ctat twice a week and so
we decided to write a short story.
Wc began without any 'plot whatand
ever, wrote one paragraph
spent the remainder of the evening
reading Kant's Critique of Pure
Reason. You simply must read the
paragraph:
Forirlvc

Snickers
Scandal
By WILLIAM ARDERY

The Greeks Dance

If all two of our public nrc in a

forbearing mood this morning if
you must know wc arc giving dear
old Fiddlcdcthcta a play.
There were at least 300 persons
with whom wc did not get to dance,
we were angered by the mug who
stood In front of brother Randall's
band and panned the entertainer,
wc really went for the smooth presentation of Sweet Sue and the enlivening Bessie Couldn't Help It A
of the
toast to the best week-en- d
semester. The visitors enjoyed the
drive through the Bluegrass.
We Sneer Without Amusement
Now that it is warm again wc
get sick from laughing at the mugs
who fall for the mugettes. In an
observatory stroll Sunday afternoon
we found every sorority porch
crowded to overflowing. It must
be that "Spirit of Youth" that we
have been hearing so much about.

that "Spirit of Youth" that

we have

been hearing so much about.

Rena, Hone, Mask
Line of the week to Thomas L.
Riley, who when the laundry man
asked, "Well
overcharged
him

The University of Kentucky track
team opened the 1931 season in
Louisville Saturday afternoon by
i defeating
the University of Louis
ville trackstcrs by 77 to 40. Kentucky won ten of the fifteen events
and in four of them took both scoring places. Five points were given
for first place and three for second
bright'
The moon was a
place in each vent.
ness penetrating the dark blueness ol
dash,
Kentucky won the
an April night. A tingle itar ttared
mile run, discus throw,
rom the Wett and the
world
at the
rag- run,
cool wind carried the tedatlvc
high hurdles, shotput,
rant odours o fresh gran. Occasiontwo-mirun, broad Jump, Javelin
ally a tllrer road emerged rom black
throw and the mile relay. Louisnothingness beneath the brilliantly
d
dash, polo
ville won the
while lights ol a car and disappeared
again as an erubescent gobule topped
vault, high Jump,
dash and
the farther hill.
low hurdles.
You would probably have enjoyed
Taylor, of Louisville, was the outit if you' had known that in the standing individual In the meet. He
end the hero is likely to dash his made a total of eighteen points,
brains out with an elephant hook taking first place in the
and the heroine has to peddle dash, the
dash and the
dash
dash, the
apples on the street to buy morlow hurdles, and
and the
phine for the kid sister.
second in the broad Jump.
Spring: Flower Picking-CampuO'Bryant won the most points for
gossip said they would. Kentucky. He won the mile run
Then it said they would not. Then, and was second in the
when it had ceased to say anything run. Molclom Foster took two secat all, they did. Mr. and Mrs. onds was the first runner on the
Wilson are now traveling in the relay team for seven and a quarter
East and on their return will be points.
domiciled at the Lord only knows.
The S. I. A. A. high Jump record
which Brady holds is 6 feet 1 inch
THE GIRL WITH A ROSE
and the Kentucky record is 6 feet
inches.
What could be more appropriate
Seventeen men helped in making
than to present our weekly rose to a un Kentucky's seventeefci points.
bride. W?e are always happy to Louisville had six men to place
see the Greekettes marry, particueither first or second.
larly when they are not Kappas.
Taylor entered in every pprint
JANE GARY
the programme but was
Jane Gary has been nominated event on in the
dash and
unplaced
and elected Rose Girl this week
high hurdles. He took his
because, although she is not exact- - first event in t he
dash.
He was timed in 23.6 seconds. He
dash in 53.8 secwon the
low hurdles in
onds and
27.9 seconds. Fred McLane jumped
to capture the
20 feet 4 inches
broadjump from Taylor.
Bud Cavana made one throw of
the Javelin and flipped the arrow
168 feet 9 inches and did not better
it on his other tries. He won the
event with that one heave.
This is the firs tyear that Cavana
has ever thrown the discus. Previous to his victory in the Louisville meet, Bud threw it but four
times and htS efforts were good for
173 feet, which is a good distance
form.
for mid-seasThree of the Wildcats, Scale,
Saunders, and Burress, who won
first places, were sophomores. Fos- -

Ml msszk-- m
Have Luncheon
at our

modern

FOUNTAIN
LUNCHEONETTE
A sandwich, a soda and a walk is a health rip

that ii guaranteed to work.
Light foods are healthful and prevent that afternoon drowsiness that comes from over eating.
For luncheon today, or any other time stop at
our modern fountain and try a sandwich,
salad or any of our delicious fountain foods.

Consolidated Drug Stores
Incorporated

PHOENIX STORE
100 E. Main St.

VARSITY THINLIES
SCORE 77-4- 0
VICTORY

CURRY'S CORNER
101 W. Main

St.

KERNEL,

Tuesday, April

SEMI-WEEKL- Y

Annual Contests
For High School
Week Finished
lie final contests of the 11th
annual High School week were conducted Saturday. In the band con
tests the followlnc schools were
Judged to be first in their divisions.
Class A, Louisville Male High; Class
B. Highlands. Ft. Thomas: Class
C, Shawnee High School, Louisville;
Class D, Danville.
In the orchestra contests Class
A Henry Clay High school was best;
Class B. Highlands Hlgn school;
Class C, Cynthiana; Class D, Louis
ville Junior High school.
Stanford had the best chorus in
Class D, of the boys' division while
In Class B, Paris was the winner.
In the girls section, Shawnee won
the Class A division. In Class B
Bcrca Academy was best and in
Class C, Augusta was Judged the
winner. In the mixed chorus di
vision Berea won Class B. Bethel
was best in Class C.
More than 2,000 Kentucky high
school students attended the con
tests, which lasted the entire week.
They were under the direction of
Professor Louis Clifton.

Dr. W. A. Sutton, superintendent of
schools In Atlanta, Ga,, and president of the National Educational
association, will speak to the students at this houn His subject has
not been announced.
LEXINGTON ALUMNI

MEET

The Lexington Alumni club of the
University of Kentucky met at 6:30
p. m. last night at the Phoenix
hotel. Judge King Swopc was the
principal speaker of the evening.
Miss Margaret Lewis, secretary of
the university Y. W. C. A., sang a
solo.
Miss Margaret McLaughlin,
president of the club, presided.

Kentuckian Plays at
Sunday Vesper Hour
(Continued from Page One)
Cincinnati, and after further studies at the College of Music was
graduated with great distinction.
Immediately following his graduation he was placed on the junior
faculty and the following year, 1926,
received the degree of Bachelor of
Music.
He continued his studies
in Europe, returning to Cincinnati
in 1929.

ter, Tuttle and Parrent, who are
members of the team, are also
sophomores.
The summaries:
dash John Heber (K),
Foster (K). Time, 10.3 seconds.
Mile run O'Bryant (K), Blunk
(L). Time, 4 minutes, 42.5 seconds.
dash Taylor (L), Foster (K). Time 23.6 seconds.
Discus throw Andrews (K), Tuttle (K). Distance, 11.6 feet 2
inches.
Pole vault Brady (L), Hubbell
(K). Height, 11 feet.
High Hurdles Emmerich (K), Shipley (K). Time, 17
seconds.
Shot Put Seale (K), Davis (L).
inches.
Distance, 38 feet 5
Run Saunders (K), O'Bryant (K), Time 2 minutes 8

Plans Are Released
For Engineers' Tour
(Continued from Page One)
Inspection trip north will Include
the Cincinnati and Dayton districts.
The headquarters of the party will
be the Hotel Gibson, Cincinnati,
and the Hotel Gibbons, Dayton.
Places which will be visited arc the
Manufacturing
A 1 1 a 1 s - Chalmers
Company, National Cash Register
Company, Frlgidalre Corporation,
Wright Field, and the Ohio Bell
Telephone Company, Dayton; Andrews Steel Company, Newport
Rolling Mill Company, The Globe
Iron Roofing and Corrugating Company, Newport Culvert Company,
American Tool Works Company,
Company, Proctor
Lunkcnhclmcr
and Gamble Company, Columbia
Power Company, and the Cincinnati Zoological Garden, Cincinnati.
The University
of Kentucky
Alumni of Cincinnati and Northern
Kentucky will entertain the party
with a dinner dance Friday, May 1.
Detroit, Buffalo, Niagara Falls
and New York will be visited by

14, 1931

the senior engineers on their thirty-secon- d
Inspection tour.
annual
Leaving here May 13, the party
will arrive in Detroit, where they
will visit, on May 14, 15, and 16,
four plants of the Ford Motor company, the General Motors Truck
Corporation, General Motors Corporation proving grounds, the
Parke-Dav- is
Drug company, and the
Fisher building. The Niagara Falls
company, the model of NiPower
agara Falls, the U. 8. Battery Corporation and the U. S. Alumlum
company will be Inspected at Niagara Falls.
At Buffalo, N. Y the engineers
will Inspect the Worthlngton Pump
company, the Machine Switching
Telephone office, Trlco Products
company, U. S. Alumlum company,
American Radiator company, American Brass company, Buffalo Consistory,
American Lithographing
company, Albright Art Gallery,
Buffalo Historical Society building,
and Buffalo Forge company.
Features of this trip will be a
banquet given by the Detroit Alumni club, a dinner with the American
Society of Heating and Ventilating Engineers, a steamer trip around
Manhattan Island, and a dinner
dance to be given by the New York
Alumni club.

Ashland Clothes

High Jump Brady (L), Roberts
(K). Height, 5 feet, 8 inches.
Dash Taylor (L), Mil-lik(K). Time, 53.8 seconds.
-- Mile
Burres (K),
Run
Two
Blunk (L). Time, 10 minutes 37.2
Broad Jump McLane (K), Taylor (L). Distance, 20 feet, 4 inches.
Low
Hurdles Taylor
Time, 27 J
(L), Weiman (K).
seconds.
Jvelin Throw Cavana (K), Kin- cald (K). Distance, 168 (feet, 9
inches.
(Foster,
Mile Relay Kentucky
Saunders, Mllikea). Time 3 min
utes, 39.8 seconds.

ly beautiful, she is, one of our. very
fw trulv ehie Greekettes: because
we have never heard; her epeak
loudly; because she is not stupid;
because she knew what she wanted
and married him; because she is
CONVOCATION SPEAKER
not interested in activities; because
-not
she does....... .have me typical aear
..
..
1
-.
The general, convocation for April
.sister atutuae wwuu aor mmwiiot,
because she has never run for May will be held at 9 o'clock Wednesday
Queen, Prom Queen, or Beauty morning, April 22 in Memorial halL
because she is the sort who
I Queen;
(will grow old gracefully; because
she married a Sigma Chi.

...

42 out of 54

Smiling the Boys Fell Dead
Just when we and Riley were
nrpnarin? to .demand that our stuff
be set in 10 point type our fair
i
editor received a letter irom. a
lfrtrmer columnist of this HlUStriOUS
rag saying that we used entirely .too
much space in tne puDncation ana
that our columns should be set in
six point type. Looking into this
gentleman's past we find that he
I
was a student at the university for
nine iyears before he .found the
Ktrpntrth ta emersre into the cruel
.world. This, understand us, does
not, in itself, merit condemnation,
but it seems that in nine years
one should know
No matter, whether he likes us
or not, Riley and Ardery do. This
is a phonograph record.
I

colleges choose

this FAVORITE
pipe tobacco

-

...

OF COURSE

!

There's Price to Consider

Marriage Bureau Replaced
The situation at the Kappa ser-9iiis no loncer humorous. With
Aloha Gams and Trlddledeltas
snaring husbands with little or no
JOHN'S CORNER ofTnrt. is upms trulv terrible that
THE lodge cannot, even with its
201 E. Main St. highly developed macninery, entrap
a single male. We sneer without
amusement.

We've considered

and Yale agrees
UP at the windows of
to find out what
the Yale man smokes. In the springtime you'll see him sitting in his
window seat with a pipeful of
Edgeworth between his teeth.

IOOK

After Your Favorite Recreation

m

U
'

On Chapel Street . . . out at the
Bowl . . . everywhere the Yale man

-

it very seriously.

vve sought the best and selected
the choicest and the most alluring, but determined
that the price must exactly suit you too.

Not only have

SUGGESTION

FOR

GRAY SUIT ENSEMBLE

goes, his pipe and Edgeworth go

with him. And at 42 out of 54 of
the leading colleges and universities
Edgeworth is the favorite tobacco.

Enjoy a cool refreshing
drink or one of our many
specialties at

A tobacco must be good to win
the vote of so many discriminating
smokers. And Edgeworth is good.
Toconvinceyourselftry Edgeworth.
You can get it wherever tobacco is
sold . . . 1 5 a tin. Or, for a generous
free sample, write to Larus 6C Bro.
Co., 10; S. 22d St., Richmond,
Virginia.

EDGEWORTH

The Tavern
'Home of the College Folks

We Deliver

Phone: Ash. 9191 - 2386

SMOKING TOBACCO
Is a blend
ol tlno old burlvya,
with I ta natural aavor
tnkanrt'd by Edict

worth'
eleven

Ii

dlattnctlve
procen.

iuy Kdiitworth any- litre In two forma

"Keady.ltubbed"
fad "I1uk Slice." All

lliea,

lit

pocket

package to pound
humidor tin.

SUIT Platinum Gray tweed or worsted
HAT Pearl Gray curl snapbrim
SHIRT Pastel solid blue broadcloth
TIE Turquoise Blue four in hand
SHOE White Sport black saddle plain toe

ENTIRE OUTFIT

.

.

$22.50
$ 5.00
$ 1.95
$ 1.00
$ 6.00

$36.45

YOU MUST AGREE THAT BEING CORRECTLY ATTIRED
AT THIS FIGURE IS REAL ECONOMY

FOURTH FLOOR DEPARTMENT

IKuufmcins
Style Corner

lirawione ut Short.

J,

*