Best Cop
THE KENTUCKY

rage Two

THE KENTUCKY KERNEL
ornciM.

HFwftPAPrn

THB UNIVBRBITY

op

of th UTtinnnT
OF KKNTUCKT

rprntd

1

COMPLETE CAMPUS

CO

V

T

B
d

ER AGE

Exicvrrvt Bo

Gf.orc;c M. SrF.NCFR
Aoss J. Ckftf.lf.ff
David II. Salyers
Ire M. Moore

Editor-in'Chie-

Betty Earle
Theo Nadelsteln
William B. Arthur
Odls Lee Harris
Frank Burger
Ralph E. Johnson

-

Feature Editor
Assistant Feature Editor
Special Editor
B ports
Bobby

Joe Qulnn

Editor
WRITERS
Billy
Robert Rankin

Bvn

f

Managing Editor
News Editor
Business Manager

Editorial Adviser
Associate Editor
AsslsUnt Managing Editor

ASSISTANT

C. T.

Raymond T. Lathrem

Bvm

NIWS EDITORS

Mack

Huihn

Sidney Buckley

Hertueh

Cliff Shaw
REPORTERS

John Morgan
Walter MUem
Betty Murphy
Melrolm Patterson
Marjorl Rlenr

J. Dotfion
Hotel DouRhltt
Mrlvtn Porden
Audrey Forster
A.

Tom Humble

BUSINESS

STAFF

Advertlalnf Staff.
Circulation Manager..

Grace Silverman
Bob Stone
Thomaa Watklni
Lillian Webb
.M Vogel, Edgar Penn
Neville Tatum.

News, 8 a. m. to 4 p. m, Univ.
TELephones:
Business, B a. m. to 4 p. m., Univ. 74. Sundays and after hours, city 2724 or 7542.
136.

HERE SHALL

1

Cuttly

HE KERNEL ALL

STUDENT RIGHTS MAINTAIN
SECOND STEP
Students and others seem fairly well satisfied
with the new registration system. The fact is,
students were registered so quickly and efficiently in September that very few of them have
thought much about it since.
One thing that has not been forgot, though,
is the general disorder and gross inefficiency
which attended classification. All the improvement shown in the new registration plan went
for naught when classification began.
In one or two departments, matters were exThe English department,
tremely unhappy.
which had to classify almost 900 freshmen in
one day, was unable to complete the schedule
of all the newcomers.
There is something essentially wrong in a
system wherein 900 persons must be classified
in one day. Sometime before the next enrollment period that system should be changed. It
seems to this paper that those departments
which ordinarily attract great numbers of students to their rolls should get their heads to
gether and devise a system whereby classification would become as efficient and speedy as
the new registration plan has proved itself to be.

RIGHT KIND OF PEP
Tonight when students gather for the first
great pep rally of the year, there must be shown
what might be called a formal informality or
an orderly disorderliness so that the most good
may be realized from the rally.
Although there should be some degree of
spontaneity at a pep rally, students should, by
and large, avail themselves to the directions of
the yell leaders so that the plans which have
been worked out to insure the success of the
gathering may be consumated.
The little colored fellows who entertain with
their absurd antics are, after all, not interested
in the success of the rally. Likewise, students
who encourage them by pitching coins to them
s
and otherwise adding to the general
of the affair, would seem to be interested
in their own amusement and not in forwarding
the aims of the pep leaders.
Tonight's rally will set the pace for gatherings to be held during the remainder of the
football season. Every student, remembering
this, should do his share in insuring the success
boistcr-ousnes-

of it.
A famous millionaire mentions that money
does not make for happiness. Still, it does enable a man to be miserable in comfort. Punch.

These economists who think competition a
bad thing never tried to get service from a man
who had no competition. Detroit Free Press.

IN SUPERLATIVES.
The heartiest bcllylafl belongs to Sam Bowman... the wickedest wink is that of Dossrtt
Rcid...thc most expressive eyebrows are those
on Ralph Johnson's forehead ... the slimmest
ankles are owned by Betty Lou Holstcin. . .the
most .uprising mustache is under Jimmy Shropshire's nose... the most expressionless face is
the one attached to James Haglcr's head. . .the
gal with the most fascinating eyes is Ann Todd
...the broadest shoulders on the campus go
with Homer Nichols. . .the most typical sopho
more is Clid Shaw... and the emptiest spot on
the campus is Memorial hall on convocation
days.

NUW, 01 -- Jim seat is
taken," said the girl in the movies as the man
sat down in her lap.
DON

T

LOOK.

OFFER CAMPUSALUTES:
1. To
brother columnist George (Hooey
Pollui) Keller, for a clean and an interesting
one.
2. To those students who manage to look
wide awake at 8 o'clock Monday classes.
3. To that chem professor who had a tooth
pulled last week at 1:17 p. m. and was teaching
his class at 1:27 p. m.
s
A. To
who carry their
coffin-nailown
g

co-ed-

UNIVERSITYPES:
knows he
Campusap-- He
The
since he lost
belongs to a fraternity, but ever
his pin he can't remember which one it is...
Sometimes he remembers that he has a date
with a girl, but then he forgets who she is...
When he's a sophomore he votes for all the
senior officers. . .at least twice... and when he's
a senior he forgets to vote at all . . . He's so absent minded that he wears his freshman cap for
four years . . and keeps going to all the classes
he went to when he entered the University...
He stays up all night cramming for a final exam,
and then falls asleep and doesn't go to it...
His professors remember him (how can they
help it?)... but he never knows who they are
when they speak to him. . .He'll probably grow
up to be the kind of a prof that people make
jokes about. . .
Absent-Minde- d

.

CAMPUSIGHS:
I. The hectic
2.
3.

"cutting-in- "

at dances.

Oral reports in class.
Organization meetings.

4. Stoogents who make puns.

DON'T YOU FEEL FUNNY
When you break a date with the B. Y. and
then sit down next to him at the show, with
somebody else?

When that man in the blue uniform and the
brass buttons follows you on a motorcycle?
When you find that you're in the scandal col-

This Campus

That World

rt

ut

;

Hooeij

Pollui

This item comes from Berkeley, so take it
for what it is worth. If anybody who has a
dollar and one cent cares to, try the experiment
and inform this department if it works. Daily
Trojan.
Political theory is coming steadily into educaEverywhere there is a heightional practice.
tened realization of the need to make the school
develop the national ideals. Isaac Kandcl.

Solicits the Favorable Consideration of
University of Kentucky
Fraternities and Sororities
For Their
Dinners
Luncheons
Dances
Social Functions During This Semester
And Other
Service Unexcelled
JOHN G. CRAMER
Manager

blue-eye-

ss

...

rve

.

...

Kirk-Patric- k,

$295

long-lasti-

Meyers Bros.

Famous Throughout America!

resist the temptation to 'imagine
Ood In his own likeness the like
ness nf a man.
Here on earth with these great

Riding Apparel
By

Meyers Brothers
Meyers Brothers are recognzed throughout America as among the foremost
manufacturers of fine Riding Apparel and
it is the preferred equipment of a major
portion of the country's leading riders.
Our stylists know the right thing to wear
and originated many of the styles accepted and approved by smartly attired
riders throughout the country. We operate the largest and most complete riding apparel department hi the country
and feature Interesting displays of cusgarments
tom made and

Ay

ready-to-put--

Mi

on

as well as riding equipment and accessories of every type and kind.
We invite you to inspect our very Inter-

esting displays. To equip yourself at
Meyers Brothers is to derive a full meas-

ure of pleasure from riding.

Irru renter
schooimati
mm

mud

00

W1

txtafaate
m

M
touch

(x

aM
tmi r
m

ta

ofc.

html

RIDING
CROPS
98c

too

a

fLOATBKS

tirt

us in

'

- smmMtmmmmktWMSSmJt

feaa

o

A Complete

an
sun.

sojcToa.

Riding Outfit

LEXINGTON, KENTUCKY

Trustee

2, 1936

were Patty Field Van Meter and
sucker. Dick Chaveaut, who says
that she has about aa much chance
of getting over with him as a penny of finding change.
Alumnus
school teacher, Trldelt Margie Fle-b- er,
Just happened by and said she
And while on the subject of our was home for a rest cure of several
s,
coagulated
the astounding days.
mental Intellect of Virginia Ever-sol- e,
transfer, is broupnt to mind.
After keeping her date waiting an
By RALPH E. JOHNSON
hour before they start to the Xavier
When it was stated in this column last week that man as race is an game, they finally drive off. About
unthinking extrovert, and that women are fast approaching men In their ten miles out on the Cincinnati
road, like all girls do, she suddenly
TT
carelessness, it was said in all seriousness. I believed It then; I believe it remembers
that she left a very imnow.
portant article behind, so the unA short walk across the campus will reveal it on every side. Take
fortunate sucker goes back to Lexlook at the Commons after the noon rush. The floor is littered with ington. This time everything goes
v
debris of all sorts. Every table top is so filthy it must be washed. A staff smooth and they reach Clncy witn-omishap. As they walk up to the
of men work over an hour to set it to rights.
ticket gate, Virginia proudly exThe same is true of the stadium after a football game. Broken
hibits her brainstorm, and cause of
newspapers, cigar and cigarette butts cover the place. Several men return to Lexington. It's her student ticket book. Yeah, he brought
work several days straightening it out.
her home and everything.
A beautiful library has been erect- ed. It should seem that students
holding.
Discontent is bred,
Sigma Chi Harold Bush seems to
would be proud of that structure, and
yet as you start out any of the revolution Is spread and you have be losing no time In getting well
a Spain, a France, a Russia, a Cuba acquainted with the freshmen of
doors there is an ugly smude where
After
the blunder
nunareas oi careiess men nave ing of all, now aren't preferable to the other sex as the evident be
capitalism,
scratched matches because they the atrocious experiments going on stowing of all his masculine put
chltude on one of the feminine sex,
couldn't wait another second to be now In foreign countries.
carrot-topp- ed
by nature, Miss Vir
outside of the hall.
glnla Harden, if appearances in the
Ugly paths have been trod into
Commons mean anything. And the
the once beautiful lawns that sursame can go for ATO pledge, Phil
round our buildings. A short cut
Angeluccl, who is getting mental
from here to there soon attracts
relaxation in the delightful com
hundreds of hastening feet. Then
pany of one "Babe" Combs.
comes the barbed wire, a sight more
.oo
hideous perhaps than the paths,
d
baby of the
The china
but placed there in an attempt to
house of Kappa, Nellie "Turnstile"
prevent those "cow trails." The
Cralk, has intimated strongly to
paths cows make are a result of
her beloved sisters that she has
following a leader In an unthinking
By FRANKLIN DRYDEN
amorous Intentions toward Tunis'
procession.
man, John Breckinridge, and that
"Unthinking procession I" Is it
BULLETIN
every one had better step aside or
possible that the same motive that
be caught In the riptide.
It's an unwritten law, copied
leads us Into the unthinking profrom the Shawnee
Indians,
cession also forms our opinion on
Elizabeth Crain says that It would
that a scandal columnist should
things public? Do we tumble out
never write about his own
be wonderful to be pinned but as
of our cribs Into line following a
eampus and amorous activities.
far as taking little Fred Fugazzl's
leader to whither we know not, yet
was concerned it was ridiculous,
This custom compounded with
always with the idea that "we"
my
are the
that he was Just a little brother to
have made our own decisions,
her, and could never be anything
reasons why one of the best
shaped our own destinies?
else.
morsels for Hooey Pollui has
i
It la egotistical of us to believe heretofore been unpublished.
,
Hats
that we have a free will? I rather
Promised "Booger" Brown not to
To my chagrin I found out
believe it is. Man is decidedly that
say anything about it, but it's Just
Tuesday night that today's dirt
way. Does it not hurt his pride to
one of those things too good to j
diplomat. Franklin Dryden, has
be classed as a mammal, to be
keep. He was stood up on his third
been groggy with happiness for
smart yo
called "animal?" Has not the idea
date this last Tuesday night. We
the past two weeks because he
that we have descended from monk
suggest getting insured by Lloyds
has pinned Mary Morty
eys gotten his goat, so that trials
I
a sophomore from Randoland cleaning up a fortune.
fashions.
prevent such a
have beert held to
ph-Macon.
You can get an
being taught In the
theory from
power when
down to the Tavern the
Went
idea of Franklin's
public schools?
I tell you that he pinned her other night and It looked like a
e tops- After observing lellow men for a
semester was but one
revival of the Commonollgists. Saw
8Uedc is
when this
short time It Is not hard for me to
at one table, Joe Huddleston, Jim
week old.
believe that we are all descended
So, If Dryden & company will
Ooforth, Bill Tracy, Wilson Housfrom monkeys, or some other order
ton, and Tlcky Scholtz all enjoying
excuse my negligence, may I
of lower animal. I used to watch
watching the coeds get their cokes
erpress their public's and my
Dean Anderson's monkeys. They
before being dragged to the two- KERLER.
congratulations.
weren't so dumb, yet not one of
bit dance. At another table was
mothem ever considered for a
By gosh, I have got to come to an seen Prof Schick with several of
ment the health or happiness of understanding with someone, or it's his students gathered around talkOthers
will the bug house for me. All these ing themselves up a blue streak. And
another. To some extent man
consider and assist his fellow man. fearful writeups predicting dire re- back In the corner were the old re'95
but the chances are that it will sults In Saturday's game have got liables, Joe Arvln, and his
11.95 10
to his attention me so upset about the thirteen
have to be called
plnee, Anna Bess Clark,
before he notices.
points I gave that until reassurance with Joe enjoying his customary
my saying that we are all is offered in large quantities, 111 bottle of beer. Up by the nickel
Now If
descended from monkeys gets your never be able to get my mind on vlctrola where she could urge him
goat, to appease your wrath, boost such a thing as this column. Nev to put the usual coins in the slot
your ego, you may cnange it w
man has ascended irom monxeys
or some other lower order." Then
thpr is also this to consider, oth
ers believe as I do, so don't blame
mo for the Idea.
Perhaps the most egotistical
ARMY GOODS HEADQUARTERS
thing man has ever done was done
centuries ago. When civilization
MAIN and MILL
began to creep into our scheme of
man beean to grope lor
rhinoOod. Something was there. They
felt. It. realized it. A great con
trolling power. Yet man, In his
infinite smallness of mind, couldn't

umn?
schemes of government Being atWhen you're dying for a chocolate sundae tempted by strong leaders there
with thick whipped cream and the date asks is always that undercurrent idea
that all men should be treated
you what kind of a coke you want?
equally.
A revolution, bloody or
When you lose your schedule card, and can't bloodless, takes place and a new
order Is instituted. Boon tne
remember what class comes next?
of men beeins to show,
The leaders come from
When the column ends suddenly like this?
classes ana a ouuer less amDiuous
btoud descend the scale.
But. whether or not there is
Here's something new for the idle college
money to be gained, there is always
children to try: Place a penny on a silver dollar. nmwr or. t.h ton. The drees at
Place a slimy, slippery short worm on the pen- the bottom are at first wistfully
wanting; men lusuuiiy warning.
ny. Gather your friends around and bet them Rn there vnti are rieht back where
that the worm won't crawl off the penny onto von started from. The under dogs
upper dogs having
the dollar. You're a cinch to win, because it wanting; the
is claimed, a current is created in the worm's
body by contact between the two metals, causto die.
ing the wormie-squirmi- e

THE PHOENIX HOTEL

ROY CARRUTHERS

Ortnlxr

promise that if you will open
up plenty of holes for our thoroughbreds to tear through, there
will never be another thing about
you in the column unless it's a
stadium full of roses.

and

SPEAKING

Wort-roo-

Friday,

er, I

Ur Tin: Campus
with "Scoop"

tnt.rra' l th Fot Offlr
Linton, Kntw, u
n.t claw miwr undrr th Act ef H.rcb i, 17
MrMnrn
Lttlnfttnn Board of OnmmMPf
NHtiorml Cnllrfp Prnn AMorlttton
Rnlurkv Intercolleflut Prm AMnrl.tlon
International !nri 8rTl
A tnnnlwr nf tr
Mnlnr Oollur Fnbllrtin.
41no' St., KfW Tor CUT; IS
i. Horn Bill Ob..
Wwkrr Dr!. Ohlro; Coil FuUdlnf, Sn Frtnrlaeo; Ml
B1t., Lot AnceM; loot arrond An, tVottlo.

KERNEL

Ladies Breeches
and Jodhpurs
Made of fine quality cotton
whipcord in a large assortEvery conment of colors.
ceivable model, all sizes

Head to foot outfit including
Jodhpur Breeches, Jodhpur
Boots. Shirt, Hat and Crop
.

.

.

Complete

$
Am

lltuo

u

II

36

week.

STANDARD
TYPEWRITER CO.
Wut

Short St.
Opp. Court Bout

1

$0.95

0.88

Li

Riding or Sport Hats, $4.00
Ladies' Jodhpur Boots, $3.95

LadieB

Sports Shirts, 98c
Also a Complete Line of Riding Apparel for Men and Boys

i

*