KENTUCKY

W. A. A. NOTES
(By MARTHA

REID)

Team nfter team has fnllen before
tlio Kentucky bnskctccrs. Every loy- nl student of the university lends his
enrneat support to Captain Carey and
his weare'ds of the blue. Hut It Is
not only In the big Rymnnshim on
Wlnslow thnt King Basketball holds
his swny.
have for sonic
Kentucky co-eweeks been devoting their time and
energy to the sport. Slowly Conch
Skinner is moulding her class cams

from the masses that present

them-

selves in the competition. The freshmen lead in numbers but Osborne nnd
Robinson and others of the sophomore
group nre fast coming to the front.
Hill, Kciffcr, nnd Alexander give
promise of a formidable junior team.
While far outnumbered, the plucky
arc doing their bit also.
senior co-eNo definite schedule of games has
been worked out but announcement
concerning the class and Greek-lette- r
tournament will be made in the near

ors bunching in one pnrt of the court.
Speed and dodging nbility come In for
their shnre of importance. Seeing the

Kentucky

Adventures of

The Cubess

FOOD

Army Physical Exam
Is Given o n Campus
U. of K. Thought to Be First
School In U. S. To Adopt

This Plan

.

East Main

Between Lafayette Hotel and
Kentucky Theater

Charleston Charley

they celebrate his closing everything
but the schools. Men may come and
men may go, but the schools go on
forever.
However, just to prove to the rest
of the world that it was February
(for the benefit of those who don t
know, I will say February includes
the birthdays of Washington and Lincoln, and Valentine day) in America,
there fell in Minneapolis. on Lincoln's
birthday a quarter of an inch or red
snow, without the permission of the
(Can you imagine
weather bureau.
such a "fox pass," without the perof the weather bureau?)
mission
Honest, that's the truth, though it
does seem as if every native of the
cify had indulged in bad liquor. To
cap it off, the people were so "flam- -'
busted," they called the fire depart
ment to ask where the fire was.
All Akkie said about it though,
was, "Well, we have red snow, white
moon, and blue grass. Three qheers
for the 'Red, White, and Blue.'

RtoaU thtleautu

of

f..

the Scarlet Tanagei

MI VHllt feu to writ
i article on
lire opittton of Mini of aur noted men
uln."
drnietrttfrtR
I replied, "f ulrwuly lmv the opinion of one of Amerlen's fortmnut nien
on thfs subject, nnmeljr Pmlttent

Cooltdip."

nerhif

In n
smitli "Well,

voice the rminffr
Mini learned cttbfww, and
Coolltlge think of uln."

KEYF.S

whnt doc
I replied
every wny" llfo a n
thnt it mn gotisrally
cubess is getting .worsor nnd wnraor." known thnt he wan "opponed to it,"
Yours till Niagara Fall,
I was comfortably sonusd on the
The Cubess.
only cushioned chair in our Korncl
office eating the desert, if it might
bo called such, of my rathor hasty :::::mj:.w:::::m::m:.t:::u::tu:i:n;js::
In wnlks our managing
uncheon.
editor nnd n sort of premonition
to me that trouble i stalking
comes
around looking for a victim. I said
GOT IT - THIS QOOQ
ft
to the managing editor.
if
CB CREAM
"Perhaps you might like a date."
Words fail me when I try to de
scribe his scorn, it was something
like I imnginc the withering blast of
a desert breeze would be when he re
Hi

dour Cub,

"Every

I nnd Akkio don't go in for nil these
slnndcrinpf criticisms on tho fnther of
our country, nnd I'll bet my Inst cent
Rupert Hughes wouldn't call old
George n enke enter if his anniversary gave him "zc grnndc holiday" it
gives us. (Ain't that tho grand nnd
glorious feclin,' one dny of rest?)
Anywny, Akkie snys we're always for
tho policy of "let sleeping dogs lie."
There s just one thing I says to her
(notice I snid just one thing) that
mnkes me sorry that I came here to
the university, and thnt's 'cause they
don't let us off on Lincoln's birthday.
It floes look like they would, 'specially
beings he was a Kcntuckian; but no,

dRy in

plied:

"Even if you arc a mere cubess you
should know enough to let me ask you
for a date, although it would never
happen even in the millenium."
I retorted r-"The date I was going to give you
was a Dromedary; I had one left from
my desert, and I thought it would be
polite to offer it to you."
I tell you cub, the air around that
little otfice was blue, and I was quite
attractively carrying out tho Blue
and White color scheme, as it were.
The managing editor thundered at
"Speaking of girls, there are still ,a
few shy ones left," remarked Charleston Charley. "They are usually shy
about ten years when you ask them
their age."

,

A. Morris
"No?"
McDowell "Yeh, they found
uor" in the dictionary."

"liq-

first freshman "I'm going to sue
my English teacher for libel."
,
Second freshman "What for?"
freshman "He wrote on my
First
English theme: 'You have bad relatives and antecedents.' "

ic,

"Leave this office."
And I replied sweetly,
"I was not intending to take it with
ic"
About two hours when the air of
the office was slightly cooler, I ventured timidly to approach our man
aging editor, from the rear, as it
were, and ask him for my weekly
In a taciturn voice he replied:

"Co
you .'"

ii

Dixie is made from the
purest materials obtainable, It is Pasteurized and
.Heathized, so its purity
is protected by the two
greatest scientific safeguards known.

THERE'S

A

DIXIE

i;:tn:i:u::::::::::;;:::::::tu:::;::::::n:;:::;:

Established

Formals
"I could die dancing, couldn't

Kodak

EW YORK COSTUME CO.
Bld., 137 N.Wabash Aue Chicago, ILL.

N

"No: there are pleasanter
ways than being tramped to death."
Co-e- d

Boob "I'm worried; my girl is
running with a new doctor in town."
Wise Guy "Feed her an apple a
day."

"Our Own King of the Ivories at the Piano
Every Night From 7:30 to 12:00 p. m. and
Sunday Afternoon from 2:00 to 5:00 p. m."

Reformer "And what are you in
jail for?"
Prisoner "My father instructed
me, madam, on his death bed, to mar-r- y
beauty and brains."
Reformer "Yes?"
Prisoner "I had to commit big
amy."

We Have the Best Fountain in Town
Tobaccos

Candies

(By f.EIDA

Teacher "Now, boys, one more
question.
Can any one give me a
sentence, with the term 'weather-beate- n'
Page the Prohibition Agents
in it?"
Small boy "My father roots for
T. McDowell "Did you hear about
the big raid at the university, found the Wildcats 'whether beaten' or not."
liquor in the library?
Overheard at One of Our Recent

Kozy Korner

Sandwiches

PAGE FIVE

'QB1RREI

baskctccrs play ball,
one would scarce think of labeling
them the weaker sex. For hours they
shot, pass, and scrimmage, and then
return next day In spite or sore mus
cles nnd bruises, as eager us ever.
Those of the gentle sex arc proving
capable of enduring the most gruel
ling workouts. They arc trying their
best to merit the title of the fair
sex by learning the elements of fnlr
LUCILE COOK
piny; to them the mere joy of playing
the gnmo Is sufficient reward for all HURRAH FOR THE RED, WHITE
effort.
AND BLUE
co-c- d

The form of physical examination
given in the United States Army,
and A. R.
known as A. R. 40-1was used last semester in the
examination of students for the first
future.
time at the University of Kentucky.
Every Tuesdny and Thursday at 4 So fnr as is known, the university is
o'clock in Miss Skinner's office, a class nmong the first in the country to inwill be held in refcreeing girls'-rul- e
troduce these army examinations.
basketball. The athletic association
The complete results of these exammany inations, statistics of which show an
Is especially anxious that as
possible report for this class. enormous
girls as
amount of tedious nnd
It is hoped that at least one member painstaking work, nre now available.
each sorority group on the cam- This data will be used for advising
from
pus will attend so that no quarrels in the parents of their children and for
may ensue instituting follow-u- p
regard to decisions
work with the
throughout the season.
students in order to remedy whatever
Practice is being held daily In the defects it is possible to correct.
women's gymnasium, and it has been
Dr. J. E. Rush, asisted by D. Standecided that- no girl may be counted ton Ross in the department of physi
who has not re- cal hygiene, sponsored the undertak
eligible for a team
ported for practiceat least 12 times ing of this project. The material is
during the period.
arranged in a composite fashion so
Gradually this year, in the circle of that the total numbej of defects in
women's athletics, the change is being each individual may be ascertained.
made from the
A method, in cases in which it is pos
boys rules to the smoother method sible, has been" devised whereby the
adapted far the modern girl. Players, graphical representation has been
who for years have acted under the used so as to bring to the attention of
old regime, are coming to be expert the student his own defects and thus
under this new and better method. stimulate his interest in removing
No longer do we find nine or ten play-- 1 them.

206

KERNEL

Fountain Pens
Toilet Articles
Puritan and Johnson's Chocolates

A malt has to

(LYMAN WOODS ON THE PIANO)

to figure how

use his head

.

costs less than pens

priced lower

Yet the wise man

YOU WILL ALWAYS COME BACK

meals served, on the campus, every
school day. Open forenoons for sandwiches, milk, chocolate, coffee, ice
cream .and candy.
3

Basement Administration
Building

Teacher "Y our private family
matters have ho interest for the
class."
Tit-Bi-

cParkerDuofold
TRY OUR SERVICE ONCE

Not in Dayton Either
The teacher was giving 'a lesson on
the Creation. John interrupted with
the remark: "My father says we are
descended from apes."

University Cafeteria

does it, this

No Hurry
Negro caller at hospital "I came
to see how me friend Joe Brown was
gettin' along."
Nurse "Why he's getting along
fine; he's convalescing now."
Negro "Well, I'll just sit down
and wait till he's through."
Call.

Thirteen Reasons Why the Profs Get

Hertz Dodges
Fords

1. When
quizz :

.

Balloon Tires

All New Cars

HE starts out byParker
that the
,

You have

the satisfaction of doing business with
real friends.

.

The Storey

Point
Duofold's
will outwear six or eight
cheap pens, and he doesn't
have to figure any further.
Stop at the nearest pen
counter and choose your
Fine,
Point Extra-Fin- e,
Medium, Broad, Stub or
Oblique. It will give you
ar

an appetite for writing.
THE PARKER PEN COMPANY

RENT-A-CA- R

to match the Peru; LuJy.Sii
"DlgDiotiwr"
Factory ondOrncrul Olflocn
JANliSVlIXIi, WIS.

DaofuldPtnclU

Company
Phone G120

Lafayette-Phoeni-

x

Garage

STUDENT REPRESENTATIVES
"COWBOY" UNDERWOOD
EMMKTT CHILES

Parh

vwm.W
tt

Duofold Jr. JJJ
Intcjmcdiite sue

Udy

With f mg

j

ilutei.u

will

Gray.
we have

our

next

2. May I go to the bookstore for
some quizz pads?
.1. I didn't hear the question.
4. Did you say we must hand in
a theme for Thursday?
5. When is our outside reading
duo?
G. I didn't bring my book to class
today; I couldn't find it.
7. 1 didn't get any farther.
8. Did you call on mo?
9. Am I late?
10. May I bo excused from giving
by speech 'today ? I have a cold
11. I read the wrong lesson.
12. I had my theme all written, but
forirot and left it m my room.
IS. I didn't hear you assign the
last part of the chapter, just the first
'
part.

ii

i

l

iw

t"

hoop skirts and the
in

When and Reel, were
loving hands
vogue,

at

homefashionedGrandfather'shome'
even in
spuns for the prom
those days, Anheuser-Buscwas
nationally known to good fellows.

....

And today

....

when feminine
heads arc boblxd and shingled, and
we dance the Charleston in expen
sivcly tailored clothes to the 6tir
ring strains of a ji:: orchestra

....

BUSCH

Hits of Philosophy

(A--

There is many a "cake eater'
that would be in a stew if ho.neede'd
(kneaded) the "dough."
2. Isn't it queer how a dumb-bewill shine with a certain amount of
1.

PALE DRY

ll

polish ?
a. Poverty may be decent, but it's
darn inconvenient.
1.
nuts to make a
It takes
Ford but only one to drive it.
5. If you seo an editor that pleases
every one, thero will be a glass plate
over his face and he will not be sand
ing up.

nntlini to use tho seeds
and skins of grapes, converting them
into seed oil and seed cnKQ, in winch
form they Una a reauy sale.
Pmnnn

Is

of college men
because, like the college man, Busch
Pale Dry
sod mixer every
where and c cry time.

is the favored drink

ua

Anheuser-Busc- h

StIouis

JOSEPH PAPANIA
Distributors

Lexington, Ky.

*