ya say it's your birthday.
The draft lottery drawing of December 1 was a major event in the life of young Americans, determining as it did their fates with regard to military service.   The day after the drawing we interviewed some of our contemporaries to find out just how the lottery would affect them and what course of action they plan to chart.
Those interviewed included Dickie Nixon, Johnnie Mitchell, Mel Laird, Teddie Agnew, Big Jule Hoffman and Louie Hershey.
I'm not too worried, because January 9 came up 194th.   Anyway, I've got a bad knee from playing football in college, which should keep me out if they start taking the middle group.
Also, I'm a Quaker,  so if things get really bad I can get an alternative service job with the American Friends Service Committee. "
"I came up number fifty, but I'm not worried.   I've got these peculair habits you see.    For instance, I like to take good looking young colored boys and tie them up in chairs and then gag them so they can't make any noise and then I pass judgements on what to do with them.   The army's not a very fun bunch. They don't like guys like me, I don't think.   I'd love to live in a barracks, though. "
"I've got me a job in the defense industry as a research associate, so I don't have any worries.   You see, some time ago Lockheed discovered that my head is the perfect aerodynamic shape for re-entry cones on nuclear missies.   So every day I go in and people blow around my head and chart the air flow.   With a job like that, I didn't have any worries even before I got a 225 in the lottery. "
'They can't lay a finger on me, even if I did come up with an 80. To start with, my draft board never even heard of me up until last September. And for another thing,  I got a terrible case of efeetism.   It's a horrible disease: you can't walk or nothin,  you just have sit there with all of your foot in your mouth.   When that happens, I can't do anything but sit and watch the tube. ".
"I got no worries, fella, cause I came up 324th.   I flunked my physical anyway, though, on my eyesight.   I have these spells,  see, when I can't make out nothin but liberal communists everywhere. Also, I don't see no colors but pink a lot of the time.   I could also get deferred to stay home and take care of my wife.   She's got the same prob-I do; seems she can't see no better'n me.   Talks real good though, near's good as Teddy Agnew."
"The draft?   Are you kidding? I've never been young enough for the draft'1 (His number was 242. )
14
December, 1969