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Image 9 of The Kentucky Kernel, April 8, 1927

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THE KENTUCKY KERNEL QOTRREL FOOD Lucile Cook SPHINX OUR MODERN i More difficult to figure out than how j fraternities exist for years with a balance of 00.0057 4 dollars and cents to their credit, and harder to solve that what so and so sees in "whatcha macallit" is the enigma of the modern age, the car question! True, this city of Lexington, which has the honor of housing us young Americans who will all be Carl Sandburgs in a few short years, has solved the problem by PARRISH DRY CLEANING CO. CLEANING AND PRESSING SUITS PRESSED 35 CENTS Phone 1550 DRY 152 South Lime Quality and Service JAMES M. BYRNES CO. PRINTING Dance Programs and Menus, a Specialty 145 W. SHORT ST. Models New-Sp- ort Are Now For Your Pleasure. 12c Mile HERTZ DRIV-UR-SEL- 20c hour STATIONS F 234 E. MAIN STREET FOR INFORMATION PHONE L. W. Culley, Mgr. 3008 Going Home For EASTER? t KNOW YOUR FACULTY Ak-ki- Then take a box of Miss Holladay'S choice Easter Candy to your She will mother or sweetheart. appreciate it. PACKED READY FOR EASTER SHIPMENT "PATRONIZE jui-jit- MAXWELL EE DRUG CO. YOUR FRIENDS" "I am not a mama's darling," re"Some of the boys even fight to drive me up to the Administration building when I don't drive up with one of 'em, I have I Etta Pi's roadster." "Huh, well, I don't think much of the I Etta Pi, and I'd rather go in than his roadster." an You know, I called it the car question. That was my error, for it quesreally is the tion vs. "one or two Packards and other horseless carriages which we and wonder gape at how we'd act if we ever got in one And I've nearly been run of 'em. over oh, about a dozen times a day, gets to be a regular daily dozen with me. It's just awful, that's all there is to it. I know one thing, though, whoever can solve this: "If a man sang 'All Through the Night' on a machine in ten minutes, and the record was smashed in three seconds with a hatchet by the neighbor next door, slide could how many fried eels backwards m through a knot-hol-e time to catch the last train for the office," can solve the car question. Thoughts of the Weak We overheard a professor remark DENTISTS DRS. J. T. & E. D. SLATON fraternities and sororities knew so many of their members were present, they would lift their pins. It seems that during the progress of the interfraternity bridge contest a Phi Delt was unable to deal, so a Tau Delt. Iowa. Frivol. There's always one girl at every dance that makes the others wish they'd gone to the movies. Voo Doo. The camnus cvnic says. "Women, women, everywhere and not a one can think." Colorado Dodo. Prohablv the reason for the decline of the nonularity of chaperones is the increasing belief in the power of guarding angels. Green boat. $25 to $39 LANGROCK SUITS $50 D. FUNKHOUSER Graduate School; Head Dept. $5 . Hammel 140 W. Main Between Lime and Upper Phone 3616 R. B. "Bob" Hawkins WILLIAM Dean Born Rockport, Indiana, March 1881. Indianapolis Educated 13, public schools; Shortridge High school 1898; A. B., Wabash College 1905; A. M. Cornell University 1912; Ph. D., Cornell University 1916; Honorary Fel-- , stud-- j low Cornell University 1916-1led in Europe and Ainca laua. Instructor Brazil High schools 1905-0- 7; Greencastle Indiana High school 1907; Headmaster Ithaca New York Cosca-dill- a -- Principal High school 1908-1School 1915-1Head Department Zoology University of Kentucky School since 1918; Dean 'Graduate since 1925. Fellow Amercian Association for Advancement of Science; member New York Entomological Society; Brooklyn Entomological Society; American Society of Zoologists; Kentucky Academy of Science; Kentucky UNIVERSITY BARBER SHOP Zoology Chairman University of Kentucky Athletic Council since 1919; Chairman Kentucky Extension Committee 1920-2Vice President Lexington Boy Scout Council 1921-2President Lexington Rotary Club 1925-2Author: Biology of Membracidae; Membracidae of Connecticut; Kentucky Birds; Outline of Zoology; Catalogue of Membracidae; Wild Life in Kentucky; also 100 technical papers in scientific journals chiefly on Membracidae. Listed in Who's Who in America; American Men of Science. Republican; Congregationalist; A NEW CAR FORDS DODGES CHEVROLETS HERTZ STOREY I'll, let my everyone thinks it's a Lincoln.". Dirge. hair Voo Doo. sixty-five- ." "What do they call her 'Dot' for?" "She's always trying to polka head in other's affairs." Sun Dial. "Is this good hair tonic?" "Good! Say, I spilled some on my Ford and it grew such a beard that SEND YOUR EASTER GREETINGS P5KKIS $$firlely Sox A clean not make your hair sticky. Barber shops apply it Drug stores sell it. At All Druggists LOVECRU LABORATORIES $1.50 the pound LAIR Phone 2386 333 S. Lime C. W. READING from forester lo store manager . After graduating from lllinoli In Tune of '22 1 started to leatn the Dullness of wood preservation with company whose president wai a close personal friend. As I learned more of the work. I could aee leaa of a real future In It. I iavtng heard of Kresge methods and Kresge prospects. 1 Investigated as thoroughly aa it U possible for an outsider to do. This convinced me that there waa more opportunity for advancement with this company than with any other I knew anything about. All my friend argued against tha Idea of my becoming a stockman In overalls. They laughed at me for giving up an almost sure tiling to go to work for a big corporation where no one knew me. Today, as a ttore manager. I can smile at these friends for I am making more money than any of them. I have gone further socially, financially, and In every other way. than would have been possible In so short a time in any other business. And I have Just started With the company expanding aa It Is. the opportunities at unlimited." C W. Rouble .. Now, Seniors its up to You J Your college career will soon be over. And then you must choose your life work. How important it is that you get started right. And it is entirely up to youl You may start in a position, that pays well now, but which offers little or no opportunity for advancement. Or you may start for a litde less in a job where there is much to learn, but which offers an unlimited future to those who are faithful and willing to work and study hard. We start college men at the bottom. But as they learn and advance we pay them more. In a few years they may become store managers dignified positions which pay high salaries. If you are interested in the job with a future, write now to our Personnel Department. We will send a man who has already found success with this organization, a graduate of your own college, to meet you ana tell you more about our business. Lexnigton, Ky. tttt MORNING Special Breakfast NOON Plate Lunch, 35c NIGHT Delightful Dinners HALL WE WILL DELIVER OR MAIL THE WILDCAT CATERS TO PATTERSON UNUSUAL CANDIES 'Fresh shipment Just received The Students Restaurant OPPOSITE HOLLINGSWORTH'S 1, 2, 3 and 5 pound sizM for DULL, UNRULY HAIR hair dressing that will with WITH SPECIAL DOUBLE WRAP FOR EASTER LIQUID HAIR DRESSING "Why, have you been stopping Embarassing "What did the man say when you containing returned his pocketbook fifty dollars?" "Said he thought it contained Courier Journal. Phone .6120 The Tavern ). Secretary Southern Intercollegiate 1924; Athletic Conference since Teeth "I dont' know. Six appeal "Hear about the Scotchman who I guess." Nebraska Awgwan. just went insame?" "No, what was the matter?" Phi "Were you fired with enthus "He bought a score card and neither iasm when you tackled your first side scored." Webfoot. job?" Osophy "Was I? I never saw a man so glad to get rid of me in my Teacher "What have we now on life." Drexerd. earth that we did not have a hundred years ago?" Diner "Are you the' young lady Little boy (bravely answering the who took my order?" question) "Me." Waitress "Yes, sir." Diner "Well, you'r .still looking fine. How are your grandchildren?" Bean Pot. Lovelay think Garage ); "Why so?" Him "Well, the doctor had to have Eyes "Oh, why did the heroine go something to test, didn't he?" and marry that man with the big "I CO. RENT-A-CA- R Lafayette-Phoeni- x i Her Tiger. ; Rent Kappa Sigma (District Grand Mas-- , ter of Kentucky and Tennessee); Sigma Xi (President Kentucky Chapter O. D. K. (Circle Visitor 1926-27- X ); 1925. 1923-24- 2401-- 4 Doors From Main amnsnHMiiiiiiiiiiiiiiimmji)-iuuuHiiiiiiiiiiiiiwiHiiwi- Association; American Eugenics Society; Kentucky Research Wilson OrClub (President nithological Club; Bradford Club; Kentucky State Historical Society; member Cornell Okefinokee Expedition 1912; Sand Cave Rescue party 1922-23- Free Phone 107 S. Limestone 6. University Students Keen Kick Shoes $7.50 204 Guaranty Bank BIdg. When you "spruce up" for Easter be sure to call on 'The only thing for you to do is to apologize and ask her to forgive you." Him "Well, they took him to the "But I was in the right." doctor's for a mental test, but it wasyou'd better take some n't any use." "Then flowers when you go." Princeton it?" For Easter we're showing the smart two and three button models, in the popular mixed tans and grays. They have that soft easy drape, so much desired by the well dressed man. Hats 8 a. m. to 5 p.m. Hours at Carl Sandburg's lecture that if the Educational He For Easier SHOP Kut-tow- a." She Dress Up TAILOR CLEANERS AND DYERS 110 E. Maxwell grow." Deluxe Mr. Stone has been very successful as an engineer and is at present head N. E. Stone, Former Engineer- of the firm of N. E. Stone and Coming Student Visits University pany, Engineers and Contractors, at Madisonville, Ky. This company has Mr. N. E. Stone, who graduated been awarded a large number of confrom the College of Engineering, tracts for road building by the Kenof Civil Engineering, in tucky Road Commission. , Department the class of 1908, was a very welcome is one of the indoor caller at the university on Monday, sports which Oxford students are folMarch 28. lowing, now that the rainy winter While a student at the university, season has set in. Morris dancing Mr. Stone was one of the outstanding and are among other forms athletes in football and baseball. of exercise. g car?" THE LEXINGTON Grad Returns plies Akkie. Fraternity Stationery ENGRAVING allowing their citizens to park their cars in such lots as Paris or Versailles when they have business to attend to down town. However, university students don't like to walk those few squares, so they all bring the horsee less devils up on the campus, and sez that one fine day she evensaw a Ford parked in White hall. Shure and b'gorra if there's one thing that will turn the hairs of the dean of women grey, it is the car question; and if there's one thing that will make the authorities of the university lose sleep, it's the car question; and if there's one thing that will make students cut classes on a lovely spring morning, it's a car! Surely these are instruments of Satan! As Akkie sez, "They leadeth me from class when the sun is bright and the morning gay; they leadeth me out at night when the moon is my temptress and the rules say, .'Ye shall not go;' and last but not least, they run over me when I do occasionally walk to classes." I took Akkie to task about this here car problem and I said, "Ain't ya ashamed of yourself, riding from the Education building to the Administration building? If you're such a little mama's darling as can not walk that far, you better go back to PAGE NINE Personnel Dcpt S. S S KRESGE 10 BUILDING, KRESGE CO j 251 DETROIT, MICHIGAN 13 5TprUJ S, 5TOLMJ