THE KENTUCKY

KERNEL
"Is ho a studo?"
'No."
"Why are you so suro?"
"Oh, I was In his room. There Is
no September Morn picture there. No
copy of Snappy Stories. Ho had no
House Rules hanging on tho wall.
'I hero woro several copies of tho Literary Digest and no ash trays. What
more !o you want?" Froth.

The Kentucky Kernel
(Formerly The Idea).
Published every Thursday throughout the College year by the student body
of the Stato University of Kentucky, for the benefit of the
nluimil and faculty of tlio institution.
THE KENTUCKY KERNEL Is the official newspaper of tho University.
It is issued with the view of furnishing to Its subscribers all the college news
of Kentucky, together with a digest of items of Interest concerning the universities of othor States nnd Cannda.
SUBSCRIPTION, ONE DOLLAR PER YEAR.
Entered at Lexington Postofflce as second-clas-

1

mall matter.

EDITORIAL STAFF.

J. FRANKLIN CORN
Dart N. Peak
Miss Anita Crabbo
William Shinnlck
Miss Rebecca Smith
McClarty Harbison
J. R. Marsh
J. T. Gooch
Harry Melton
S. J. Caudill

FIVE CENTS PER COPY

No Place For Lewis.

The Kentucky Colonel Says:
Current Poetry.
Assistant Editor
Well, suh, nil I got to sny to you Eight hundred volts
Managing Editor.
"Squirrel Food" about Inst week's spring edition, suh,
Rnn through his frame;
"Cocd"itor is thnt I hope you
and tho edltuh will Or eight hundred amperes
Athletic Editor
You
Killed him just tho samo.
Exchange Editor not spring nnothnh ono soon.
have given us an elegant sufficiency,
Homo Economics
Vers Libre.
suh.

EDtTOlMN-CHIE-

An authoritative edict has put tho
ban on the strangle hold in dances.

Tho command is to loosen up. Tho
appcnl was made to tho sorority girls
lo reruso to danco with young men
who fail to observo tho ruling.
Colorado.

j

Locals and Law Julia Vanaradnlo
Mechanical Hurbert Graham
Fraternities
Mining
MM Anna L. Whltworth... .SororltleH

I

Lovely Fashions!
How
REPORTERS.
Intllsponsnblo
M. C.
W. T. Cottingham
II. J. Evans
Estill Woods
They
Miss Mildred Taylor.
Aro; the masculine
BUSINESS STAFF.
Business Manager
W. J. Harris
If some of the clrls you know. Ec is soothed and
young fellow, were asked to got busy Delighted;
Words, Idle Words.
with the family broom, they would do- - TllG brightness
Of Spring is
clnre it to bo the last straw.
Emphasized;
book was the dicThe old woman, who once said that her favorite
n"t best, oh joy
The Kentucky Colonel Says:
tionary and thnt she enjoyed reading it because the subject changed so
During fashion week everyone has Of
often, would undoubtedly receive a pleasant surprise if she could have the
opportunity of glancing at some of the new and striking "subjects In tho recourse to books, suh. The womenjjys!
get out theah ordah books and tho(T"ey furnish a
Webster's New International Dictionary, 191C edition, which has recently
men grab for their pocket books, suh. Topic
come off the press.
For feminino
"Jinx," "tango," "bromide," "jitney" and many other words of hitherto
Conversation.
The Bright Stude Answers.
colloquial use are given official recognition by the new book.
Rude: Can you tell mo tho differ
Several hundred new words are listed in an addendum to the edition.
ence between a thirsty horse and a
These newcomers spring from various sources. Science adds some, aerodairyman?
nautics contributes many, the Olympic games have introduced foreign
Studo: Sure, one drinks the water
FIVE YEARS AGO
sporting terms into the United States and are responsible for many addi(From the Files of The Idea.)
and the other waters the drink.
tions, and slang adds a large quota.
A Deep One In Slang.
Jack: I Intend' to be a great sur- geon. What do you think of tho Idea?
Finney
Jill: Cut It out, kid, cut It out.

"

More

"Grapevine," "turkey trot," "Boston," "grizzly bear" are a few of the
dances listed.
"Jinx" is delined as follows: "A person, object, influence or supernatural being that is supposed to bring bad luck or cause things to go wrong."
The latest mode of transportation has not been neglected, and "jitney"
is accredited with two meanings: "1. Five cents, a nickel. 2. An automobile vehicle which carries passengers for a
fare."
"Affect" may be used in the same sense as "effect." "Affect" Is defined as a noun, a direct derivation from the verb of the same spelling.
five-ce-

A "Texas leaguer" is a

"short

fly

that falls too far out

to be handled

by an infielder and too close in to be caught by an outfielder."

"Bromide" is defined as "a person who is conventional or commonplace in his habits of thought or conversation."
one of Colonel Roosevelt's additions to the American
vocabulary, appears for the first time and is listed as "the gradual extinction of a race by tho voluntary failure of its members to have a number of
children sufficient to keep the birth rate equal to the death' rate." "Mooso"
and "Bullmoose" also appear.
"Race-suicide,- "

Others that appear are:
south-pay- ,
cubism, higher-up- ,
sleep.

Aero,
spit-bal-

blue sky law, cabaret,
pulmotor, white slave and twilight

Let's Go.
Each University of Kentucky chapel service marks a larger attendance than tho preceding one., Students who have not attended chapel
since tho first chapel day of their freshman year are attending and making
resolutions to refrain from "cutting" another exercise thiB year. What is
the reason? This question needs no answer for those who now. attend, but
the Kernel thinks it well to enlighten others, who aro laboring under a
misapprehension as to what they have missed and to give them a "tip" as
to what is yet to como.
i

Privilege has been given each class to conduct a chapel exercise and
select a speaker. The senior and junior classes have held their chapel
exercises. On tho senior occasion President Emeritus James K. Patterson
was tho speaker; on tho junior occasion Professor H. H. Cherry, president
of tho Western Kentucky State Normal School, delivered tho address. Tho
dates of tho sophomore and freshman exercises have not yet boon decided
upon but they will bo set for a day In tho near future. After each cluss
has conducted Its chupel oxerclso all the classes will conduct a joint exorcise and will have a speaker of unusual distinction.
Two prominent men have already made known their willingness to
address tho student body In chapel and It is probablo that a number of
others will accept an invitation to do so within a short time. Hamilton
Holt, editor of tho Independent Magazine, will deliver an address in chapel
April 25, under tho auspices of tho League to Enforco Peaco. President
Dabnoy, of tho University of Cincinnati, who will bo hero at an early dato
to address tho Premedlcal Society, will also givo an address in chapel.
Tho dato of his address bus not yet boon fixed.
Give your attendance and help make chapel a success.

beg

your

par-

Gargoyle.

Strap.
ban has been placed on necklcss
and sleeveless gowns with the strap
across tho shoulder at the University
of Notro Dame.
A

Splish! Splash!
Carrie "Molly's crying because she
can't get her Latin."
Harrie "Pouring over her work,
eh?" Stanford Chaparral.
Bould Things.

Gwendolin "We
further, Cyril."
Cyril "Why not,
Gwendolin "The
getting bolder and

Phew!
reads:
Kills Them Both."

"I

of

Good-By- e

A headline

in the Chicago Herald
"Sings Child to Sleep; Gas

"What do you call

Ho (blushing)

don."

.

"Brassiere," a woman's garment, is completely defined and explained,
so is exposed another of the secrets of the fair sex.

'

Than Some Wear.

that part
jour skirt under tho lnco?"
She "Oil, that's n slip!"
He

March 30, 1911.

any

musn't walk

dear?"
horrid rocks are
bolder."

Senior mechanicals spend week in
Chicago and vicinity on inspection
trip.
Every time a Domestic Science
Tho Kernel extends congratulations
Tennis club organized.
to the Vanderbilt Hustler and Sazorac
freshman eats a piece of fudge she
Junior mechanicals return from inwishes she had a pickle to go with It.
for the snappy, not to say interesting,
spection tour to Cincinnati and Daj'-topapers they have been putting out for
'the last few weeks, also for the stir
No Doubt of It.
J. I. Miller, now a lawyer in this
One of the ungodly who saw tho cty, wins Patterson Literary Society ,they have caused in Y. M. C. A. cir
cles.
sign "Rob?" all over the fair face omtnrip.il onntp?t
of the landscape last week remarked
"My love," said tho beaver, pasthat he understood it all but the ques- 4
sionately, "como and live in my newly
tion mark.
built house in tho stream."
HERE AND THERE
. For a moment tho beaver
maid was
Yes, Gladis, we tu ar in faver of
silent, then, coyly slapping her tail on
spelling, but wo can not approv
4
tho bank, sho whispered:
"Thon you
the simplifid gramer sum of our spek-ordo givo a dam for me after all." Caldispens so delitefulj.
At the Movies.
ifornia Pelican.
'Twas midnight and the sun was risSometimes ithe fellow who smells
Do You Carry Papers?
ing in tho west,
like gasoline isn't the owner of an Tho villain shot
Athletic Director So you want to
his head off when
Maybo
automobije.
he had
his He stabbed him in the chest,
be excused from our walking class.
clothes cleaned for Style Week.
What are your reasons? Do you carIn rushed a young girl
ry papers?
Bent with years,
Student
The average college student's idea A smile was on her face
sir.
A. D. Well, in that case I guess I
of a luxurious life is to get his shaves Her eyes woro filled with tears,
can let you off. What papors do you
In a bnrbor shop.
He's all wrong. She saw the dead body lying b',
"Safety First" is our advice.
And cried, "who is ho? Who is ho?" carry?
Student Well, I carry different
Tho dead man raised his headless
kinds. SomotlmoB
body and cried,
and
How To Write a Movie Play.
sometimes Bull Durham. Purduo
First get tho experience. Learn to "My stars! it's Lizzie."
Exchange.
ride a horse or a goat or any other
sim-plifi- d

Jump off a few cliffs and
drown yourself in tho ocean. Then
get in condition so when you aro
shot with a pistol you will only leap
straight up and run a la Chaplin.
Learn to drink out of u bottle and to
fight after you aro dead. You must
also bo able to danco gracefully, walk
tight ropes and stand up under numerous blows on tho brow. This Is mero-lpreliminary tho love scones aro
yet to bo studied. Get u girl who
looks in your oyo and falls on your
neck und leans on your chest and
kisses you four minutes ut a tlmo.
You will then bo qualified, but you will
liko tho oxporlonco bo well you won't
stop to write the pluy.

t

fiery steed.

COLLEGE MEN

!

Have you seen those swell English Last Shoes we uro showing
this season? Tliey aro sure beauties; made In mahogany calf and
gun metal calf. They fit like a
glovo and stand the kuocks. They
aro Just tho Shoo for' tho Dressy
Young Fellow. Prices, $4, $4.50
and $5.00 the pair.

The Special Shoe Co.
206 West Main Street,

Lexington, Kentucky.

Cy Hanks, Manager.

*