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Image 5 of The Kentucky Kernel, December 18, 1925

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KENTUCKY PAGE PARALYSIS The Phoenix Hotel gives especial attention to chummy and also sftt down at the same table. And here is what we gathered within the hour. The family is the basic group. . . Boyl But wnsn't that old girl swectl . . . Gosh I'm sleepy. . . That's nothing'. I didn't go to bed till one PARTIES AND BANQUETS I FOR . JOHN - Manager G. CRAMER, I could . . Wish "B-z-- Cafeteria Home Cooking- . , hear from home. I'm busted flat . . . Goin' to th' hop tomor'? . . . Got a earful, I'll tell th' world. She snid, . . . Read the funnies this mornin'? Th' Gumps are good . , . (Silence.) The family is the . . . Say- - Whnt'n th' heck did you guys run oft" for ? Th' fun . . . (And so on and on and on.) Finally, somebody tiptoed up, and asked the Tongues to desist, please. UNIVERSITY ORGANIZATIONS 60c Luncheons $1.00 Dinners FOOD (By Norman Allen) CONFUSED BY TONGUES A few clnyf? uro wo went into the library, selected n work which we hnd decided to rend nfter bcinp told twice to do so, and settled down for an hour's rending. No sooner did wo take possession of a chair, however, than two youngsters beenme very (Silence.) The family is the basic society The bell I left the .. Jingl-l-le- ! library; with an earful. "What was eatin' her, anyhow?" growled one of the Tongues, as It left the building ahead of me. "We weren't snyin' nothin'." At first I was inclined to dispute with It. But, after all, I decided, It was right. mathematics is correct but that she is ungrateful, after they was kind to let instend of us out the the twenty-thir"I think it's just awful that lust week's Kernel said, If any of you sec Santa, tell him some of us might get home for Xmas. Ain't that he selfish modern?" Akkie ain't half as kind nnd sweet as I nm, she never y?. "Ikkic," (she calls me that, beings it arouses my angry passions) "I 'spose" she says, "by that they mean the people whe Mve in Lexington, or close about as Winchester, those might get home for Christmns." (Ain't she the scratchy part of a cat?) "Achsnh," I says in my sweetest voice, "I love my school work enough I can't wait to write to stay over. my book report on "Why the Soviet Government Likes Red," Petropav-lovskConfess, now, you do want to write your term paper on "Why Your Little Toe Is So Little?" Due to my diplomatic nature, the storm cloud changed it course, and in a few minutes Achsah says, "I'll bet my bottom dollar, you'll hate getting home lat'e, since you won't have time to fish out the presents from last year that you don't want, and give twenty-secon- THE d OF DISTINCTIVE JEWELS Novelities of All Kinds Victor Bogaert Co, Jewelers and Importers y. Established BRUSSELS 188.1 PARIS FRANCE BELGIUM LEXINGTON, KY. 5 W. Main St. Wishes you a very MERRY CHRISTMAS Sun., Mon., Tues., Dec. 20, 21, 22 Douglas Fairbanks In WILL NEVER HAPPEN "Don Q, Son of Zorro" d Styled for young men sas City, December . "Yeh." I replies. "And I notice Somebody connected with this paper further that Hez has got the Bug." seems to think the reporters are sec"Zel" (Oh, her sweet voice! It ond Sherlocks. We have just read would charm a snake.) "Don t you an assignment which gave the report reckon he will even send me a Xmas er this advice: "See Hook." Now who card ?" might Mr. Hook be? "Yeh, he might write you 'Merry Christmas' on a postage stamp." We can imagine many dads Whereat Akkie begins suggesting next week that "Historv rnents for my presents St. James versions 01 itself the prodigal son returns." the Bible (only 75c), side combs, and the like. Which wins for her the day. OUR CHRISTMAS PRESENTS (By Lucile Cook) THINGS WHICH What's that old hymn about "Count your Blessings, One by One?" Well, Akkie and I spent last week-endoing that, since we had nothing elst Bob Mitchell a graduate. to do. The two of us had been quarDean Melcher doing the "Charlesantined for "campusitis." It was pro- ton." nounced a very bad case. You know, Daddy Boles in a hurry. the book on orderly conduct for wo "Bull Neck" Webb declaring a holmen students of the university reads iday. something like this, "During a campus An election without politics. a student may not leave the university Everybody glad to see "Bad News." grounds. Of course, that was one Three weeks Christma! holidays. thing to be thankful for, to stay on Lexington Drug devoid of loafers. the dear beloved soil. A Phi Delt under six feet. The notes we received read thus: No interest in the Centre game. "Dear Nightingales. A tamed "Wildcat." We know there was a long train selling at a reason The Book going by at the end of Ljme about able price. Store 10 or 11, and that you lost your A "Men's Only" barber shop. gloves and had to go in every soda Dean Anderson without monkeys fountain for them, but the fact reA student. mains that .you arrived at the old hall All students walking to school. door at 11:01 This is a terrible An entire class passing chemistry state of affairs, and we feel we must No cars parked on the campus. make an example of you. Your camMiss Horsefield missing a class. pus will begin Friday at 6 p. m. and Entire class waiting 10 minutes fo: cease Monday, 6 a. m. a prof. Yours for the best, Mrs. Server assigning an easy les- STETSON HATS HOUSE convention For Your Beautiful Christmas Gifts In Jewelry 'em back." (I see I was a little previous. She would have the last word). So I say "No one but a guilty party would have thought of that. No, my fair dame, I ain't goin' to do that. I've take particular notice to those nice GOOD BUSINESS SENSE things in the party boxes that you Why don't .you have can get at the book store for 10c per. First student: your shoes repaired? Another lapse of time. No. 2. Second stude (who is "broke"): I "Zelda," I hears, (She's made up thought I'd wait till I got on my feet with me). again. "That's my name." "Have vou noticed how all the boys "The worm turns," read the Book-Worare getting mad at their regular girls, as he turned a page. heads wear Stetson hats they look well and last long. Do you wear a Stetson? FIVE which will be held nt Kan28, Miss Mary Hester" Cooper and L. Two Delegates Elected To AtA. Pardue were initiated into the tend National Convention Both initiates graduated chnpter. from the university last June, and At a regular meeting of the Ken- are now taking work lending to a tucky chapter of the society of Sigma mnstor's degree. Prof. E. N Fergus, of the College Xi, Friday evening, Dr. O. T. Kop- pius nnd Dr. M. N. Stntes were elected of Agriculture, read nn interesting paper on The Science of Crop Prons delegates to the annual national duction. Sigma Xi Initiates killed by dilute solutions of hydrogen peroxide, nntlseptlc ffnfttlen and noeo (CONTINUED KKOM PAGE FOUR) wnslios. These are recommended for family should be praticed. The patient should the use of the patient, nurse, members not bo allowed visitors as they may physician, and to the other just how far "this of the In the face of an should family, but become carriers. be practiced as a prophylatlc epidemic public meetings of all kinds, measure Is questionable. particularly of children, should bo prohibited. Inauguration of nnnunl Dad's day It has been shown experimentally will be made this week at the Univerthat the virus of the disease may be sity of New Hampshire. Invitations INFANTILIS KERNEL i i r i. uus iu xuui nisi, enaiice l see a! picture and at our regular price of admission. ' Wed., Thurs., Fri., Sat., Dec. 23, 24, 25, 26 LEWIS STONE and SHIRLEY MASON In "What Fools Men" d RSI RSS HAPPYLAND SUGGESTS 1 CHRISTMAS PRESENT for the little brother or sister 'back home' and for the A little one you wish to remember. W. S. G. Now, I ask you, wasn't that a fine time to get out of campus? Just think! get out of bed at 6 o'clock to get out of campus! 'Course, we had other blessings. A "goat" always does. Akkie says we can at least thank W. S. G. for keeping us from mailing laundry, and sich errands that us freshmen lick up like a cat docs milk. After a lapse of time (as the movies say) Akkie says she never saw a" place celebrate Christmas like our Alma Mater. "They believe in giving one and all of their students presents, such nice gifts, as a quiz in French Monday, one in history Tuesday, English Wednesday and throughout the week until the greatly talked of twenty-seconIt don't matter what you take, those quizzes will hit 'em all this week and the thirty hours P. S. I tells her I ain't sure whether her son. Dr. Tut-hill'Somebody appreciating jokes. A rainy day without "slickers." An easy course in Physics. Plenty of room at the A noiseless Ford. A dance which starts on YOU WILL ALWAYS COME BACK Serving tea during a class. of students in the between building No contrestion Evervbodv haDDV. A speed cop who says: "That car won't run. I'll race you to the next town and if I lose I'll give you ten ' bucks." Someone doing the "Charleston" right. A millionaire who is broke. Emmet Milward in overalls. Tnntnin" John Smith a Sheik. The campus "ash" wagon without the dirty poodle. XMAS GIFTS Dodges Fords I THAT WILL BE APPRECIATED Curling Irons Electric Irons 1 You have Buss Clamp Lamps Allen-Maste- 1 it rs Company Electric Co. "THE LIGHT HOUSE" K3 THIRD FLOOR Lime at High J. the satisfaction of doing business with RENT-A-CA- R Radio Sets dec- Balloon Tires The Storey Toasters 1 -- real friends. Radio Batteries , B Hertz All New Cars 1 while stocks DON'T FORGET our party favors and orations. TRY OUR SERVICE ONCE time. Administration classes. Boudoir Lamps We suggest you shop now are complete. I dance. iii HAPPYLAND is practically a "FAIRYLAND" these days display after display of toys that will delight the heart of any child. Coming in January CHARLIE CHAPLIN in "THE GOLD RUSH" His First Picture in Three Years! Phono 6115 Phone G120 Lufayette-I'hoen- u ilurnxv STUDENT KKPKESENTATIVES EM MUTT CHILES "COWBOY" UNDBKWOOU