xt74f47gr068 https://exploreuk.uky.edu/dips/xt74f47gr068/data/mets.xml University of Kentucky Fayette County, Kentucky The Kentucky Kernel 19191205  newspapers sn89058402 English  Contact the Special Collections Research Center for information regarding rights and use of this collection. The Kentucky Kernel The Kentucky Kernel, December  5, 1919 text The Kentucky Kernel, December  5, 1919 1919 2012 true xt74f47gr068 section xt74f47gr068 The Kentucky Kernel
UNIVERSITY OF KENTUCKY
LEXINGTON, KY. DEC. 5, 1919

VOL. X.

ANNUAL

IY

BANQUET

HELD

INSPIRING TALK IN
CHAPEL FRIDAY

ORGANIZE PADUCAH
CLUB IN UNIVERSITY Y.W. C. A. RALLY HELD

FOOTBALL SQUAD Returned Missionary Urges Students
to

Go

No. 11

Twenty-fiv-

to China.

Team and Friends Feast at Students woro given an unusual
Leonard Optimistic Vein treat In chapol last Friday morning
when Maurlo Wilson, an old U. K.
in Speeches

e

Members Obtained
First Meeting.

at TUESDAY

Tho initial meeting of tho Paducah
Club was held Tuesday night, November 25, at 7 o'clock in tho Natural
Science Building. The following officers were elected: Carl Denker,
president; Nell Hank,
Edith Alexander, secretary and Lawrence Burnham, treasurer.
The purpose of the club Is to unite
into closer fellowship the Paducah
students registered in the University
of Kentucky and to bring into closer
relationship the people of Paducah
with the University of Kentucky.
Meetings will be held on the first
and third Tuesdays of each month.
There are about twenty-fiv- e
members
in the club.
A committee was appointed to draw
up a constitution composed of Miss
Lora Robertson, Ed Puryear and G.
Segenfelter.

GREAT SUCCESS

$675 of Budget

Raised in

First Days
Work

man, who has Just returned from
DR. McVEA SPEAKS
Hong Kong, addressed them on the
McVEY MAKES TALK
Shantung question.
Mr. Wilson is
The Rally of the Y. W. iC. A. which
Kentucky men who for long weeks especially fitted to discuss this matwas held at Patterson Hall Tuesday
had undergone all the privations and ter olnco he has been for several
evening at 0:45 o'clock wag a success
sacrifices Incident to football training years intimately associated with the
from every view point. Talks both
were given a real turkey dinner and students of China as Professor of
inspiring an dat the same time filled
an evening of genuine pleasure Tues- Physics in tho University of Hong
with pep an denthusiasm were made.
day when they and their friends as- Kong.
Dr. Emile W. McVea, president of
"Forces both external and internal
sembled at the Leonard Hotel for the
Sweet Briar Colle.e made tho prinin iChina and Asia are working to
annual football banquet.
cipal address of the evening.
The
Forty-thremen were present. This make these countries unsafe for debudgot was read to the association
number included the entire 1919 foot- mocracy," said the speaker, "and the
and various phases of the work of
ball squad, members of the faculty, only solution Is democratic educacommittees for which money was
several alumni and a few other tion."
needed were presented, short talks
Air. Wilson declared Japanese rule
friends of the team. At the banquet
being made by Louise Will on For
the announcement of the election of to be "the tryanny of the unfit," sayeign Missions, Virginia Milner, Home
Eger Murphree for captain of the 1920 ing that it would make even the
Missions, Adele Slade, Social Service;
squad was made by the retiring cap Kaiser blush.
Elizabeth Kraft, Social, and Lucille
EGER MURPHREE, CAPTAIN
The speaker ended his address
tain of the Wildcats, Tony Dlshman,
Moore, Program. Dean'Simrall intro
OF 1920 WILDCATS.
VV. C.
Shinnick, alumnus of the with an ardent appeal for men to go
duced Doctor McVea who came here
ENGLISH CLUB GIVES
University of Kentucky, presided as aa missionaries to China. "I'm lookfrom a conference she ha3 been atThe new captain has played varsity
ing for men," he said, "to go out
foastmaster for the occasion, and call
tending in Louisville.
football for four seasons but is elig
ed upon many of the guest3 for short there and play the game for Christ." lble
"The Young Women's Christian Asfor the 1920 season because of
talks.
sociation," said Dr. McVea, "has a
S. I. A. A. ruling that the season
the
power and influence no individual
President Frank L. McVey was the PA T. HALL IS SCENE
of 1918 should not be included in In
Ruskin, Lowell and Whit- possesses. In the last four years we
first to respond, making a
records. Murphree will
man Discussed in Chapel have learned more than ever what
talk to the students, giving his
OF INFORMAL DANCES graduate at the end of the present
Tuesday
the Association means, what great
on collegiate athletics, and
views
school year, but will return next fall
and definite ends it can accomplish.
promising the teams of the future his
for
work.
Among other Attendance Is Restricted to
heartiest
Tuesday's Chapel exercises were in It has the opportunity to interpret
"Murph" is a Senior in Industrial
things he said, "Football is a part of
U. K. Men and DormiChemistry, a member of the Sigma charge of the English Club and a pro- God to the world and the teaching ot
the educational machinery of a uniResidents
Nu Fraternity and of the Alpha Chi gram in honor of the Whitman, Rus- the doctrine of love is one of its purversity . . . and plans should be
Sigma chemical fraternity. He hails kin and Lowell Centenary was given. poses. It has a great vision of youth,
worked out by which the coaching
The .Recreation Hall at Patterson from Louisville, was a football staf on James Dixon, president of the club, seeing the highest things that can be
staff of the teams should have at its Hall, presenting a most Inviting ap- the Boy's High School eleven, and presided, opening the exercises with a seen and setting about to accomplish
command an unceasing stream of ex- pearance with its new wicker furni- has been a member of the varsity of scripture reading especially fitted to things worth while. Dr. McVea expressed her deep interest in the)
He con- ture and cteonne hangings, has been the 'University of Kentucky for four the occasion.
cellent football material."
gratulated the 1919 team upon its the scene of several successful Sat- years. His recent selection as right The three poets were discussed by budget and prophesied that It would,
record, and said that It had played urday night dances. These dances tackle on the
team gives the speakers not only from the lit- not be hard to raise with such a splen-- .
through a successful season because are given by the girls of the dormi- him a perfect record, having made erary point of view but rather as did association backing it.
The real drive began Wednesday
it had fulfilled the two greatest re- tories, with the men of the University the
team all four years great and patriotic men whose Ideals
quirements having done its best, and as guests, for the purpose of creating he has played in
have influenced and are influencing morning. Teams and captains were
appointed
two for the three dormihaving played the game cleanly and a homelike atmosphere and introducus today.
squarely, victories being of no great ing the new men to the social side of
"Walt Whitman had reverence for tories, and one for the faculty and
The results of each
importance.
President McVey said college life.
IOWA GIRLS MUST SWIM
FOR the past, reveled la the present and town people.
day's campaign will be registered om
every effort was being made for big
A committee appointed from the
THEIR DIPLOMAS.
was hopeful for the future," said
Improvements in the athletic equip- Student
William Soward In his talk on the clocks representing the three teams
Government
Council, by
ment of the University, and that with Louise Will, president of Student
(Exchange.)
New Jersey poet. "He trusted all men which will be placed in the Recreation Hall. Martha Buckman, captain,
a little time Kentucky should have Government, assisted by a memberj University ojt Iowa Women are lit and was trustworthy himself."
the best team in the country.
Ellznhftth Marsh nil nnnkn nn .Times of the Blue Team, was In the lead at.
of the Student Government Advisory erally required to "swim for their
The second talk of the evening was Board, chaperones the dances. No diplomas." Heretofore swimming has Russell Lowell, the American, the tne close of tne flrst day's campaign
made by Dr. J. J. Tigert, whose wit unconventional dancing will be allow- been taught, but as an elective sub- man who is remembered today for having raised $300, the White Team
the ban- ed. Those who disregard this rule ject only. Instructors in the physical his big heart, plain common sense, with Bernice Young, captain, came
and wisdom entertained
queters. He offered congratulations to will not be called down on the floor, training department for women be- public spirit, social justice and stern, second with $285 and the Black or
Team third with $90
the team for their recent successes, but the guilty members of the Associ- lieve that every girl should learn how
patriotism.
and resorted to his favorite topic, ation will be called up before the to take care of herself in the water
Adele Slade held John Ruskin up
"Reminiscences," which was very in- Student Council.
and advocate making swimming
in a new light. "Tho economic revolt STROLLER
S
teresting and of historical value to The dances are for the girls of the
which we are facing today is Influ
TO BE REVISED
the assembled Gridiron stars and sub- three dormitories,
enced to an almost unbelievable
their week-enAt a meeting of the Strollers, held
stitutes. He made a touching refer- guests, and the men of the Univertby Rusklu. The great memor- Wednesday afternoon, It was
CADET HOW SATURDAY.
decided
ence to the intense patriotism of the sity of Kentucky exclusively. Lexingable quality, however, which stamps that the constitution and
s
of
members of the unconquerable Bquads ton men and students of other colThere will be the first Cadet Hop of the life of John Ruskin was his the society should be altered and
'15 and '10, every one of whom, leges will be admitted to the dances
the season on Saturday, December 6, boundless sympathy for human suf- corrected.
Mr. Frazler, president of
wth the single exception of one who only when a card of permission has In the Armory. All students are per- fering," said she.
the society, appointed Miss Martha
was physically unfit, entered the serv- been obtained from the house presi- mitted to coma even
it not members
iiuckman and Preston Cherry to as
ice of his country. One of these im- dent, Louise Will, upon the request of the University battalian, but the
NOTICE.
sist him In this work.
mortals, Howard Klnne, '15, was kill- of the dormitories.
attendance will be confined to UniThere will be an Important meeting
Plays for the year were discussed.
ed in the service.
Saturday evening, December 6, will versity students. Tickets will be on of the Senior Class Monday after It was announced that the selection
Ceach Gill and "Daddy" Boles both be the next Patterson Hall dance and sale in the Commandant's office on noon at 3:30
o'clock. It is imperative of the annual play would be made at
responded with words of commenda- - all students of the University are cor- Friday from 3:30 to 4:30
aad on Sat- that every member of the class be the next meeting and
s
ar
dially invited.
urday from two to three.
present.
ranged.
(CmUbm m Page 7)
e

heart-to-hea-

tory

inter-collegia-

Town-Facult-

y

BY-LAW-

d

ex-te- n

try-out-

* THE KENTUCKY KERNEL

PAGE 2

STRAND

CONCERTS DAILY, AFTERNOON AND EVENING

ALL AMERICAN
ORCHESTRA

THE STRAND

Luther Burbnnk, who had only a few
potatoes and what great things camo
S
ELEVEN
from them because ho had a thankful
TALK AT Y heart. "And so," Bnid Doctor Bush in
Turner Gregg Unanimously Chosen
conclusion, "a thankful heart quadCaptain.
ruples our genius and helps to make
Turner Gregg was unanimously
"Thankfulness" Is Subject us better men nnd women."
chosen qunrterbnek and made captain
Doctor Tlgert will be the speaker
of Discussion Special
team Tuesday, Deof the
next Sunday evening.
His subject
Music Enjoyed
cember 2, when Coaches Tlgert,
will be, "The Temple of God."
Funkhouser, Webb and Owens cast
their votes for the men deserving a
At the "Y" meeting held in Patterplace on the
Eleven. Orcgg son Hall Sunday evening, Doctor NEW COURSES FOR
received the highest vote of any one Bush, a friend to every student in the PSYCHOLOGY CLASSES
man and was automatically made cap- University, spoke upon the "Power of
tain.
Having a Thankful Heart." Doctor Practical luiinets Subjects to Be
Taught.
"The other men chosen for the team Cornell directed the singing, accomwere: Clark, Freshman, and Walling-ford- , panied by Elizabeth Allen at the
Senior, ends; Lisenby, Senior, piano and Catherine Denton on the "The Department of Psychology is
planning to offer two new courses the
Enlow, Sophomore,
tackles; violin.
and
The choir sang as a special selec- forthcoming semester, advertising and
Worth, Senior, and Crenshaw, Sopho-.morguards; Smith, Freshman, cen- tion, "It Is Well With My Soul" and vocational psychology. The courses
ter; Howard, Senior and Morris, an instrumental solo, "Nocturne," by planned by Or. Tlgert, head of the DeSophomore, tied for full back with Chopin, was rendered by Eliabeth partment of Psychology, are designed
to meet a demand for training in
two votes each; Slomer, Sophomore, Allen.
methods of placing merDoctor Bush said that the foundaone half and Propps and Haydon,
Juniors, dmondu and Thornton, Sen- tion of the world is not the brain but chandizing wares before the public.
Two phases of the subject will be
iors, and Bayless, Freshman, each re- the heart. "The very first Thanksgiving Day in America," said Doctor offered next semester, that of busiceived one vote for the other half.
in
The Seniors rank first in the num- Bush, "the people had much to thank ness advertising, salesmanship,
ber of men chosen from their Eleven God for but in 1623 though the tables tended to meet the needs of those stuwith a total of six. The Sophomore were turned and the people had little dents who contemplate going into
and Freshman teams tied with four to be thankful for, they kept the business, and the psychology of ad
men each and the Juniors only had day of Thanksgiving because America vertising, intended to meet the needs
two men picked from their squad.
was built on heart. Their ranks had of the Journalist. These courses come
been thinned by disease and their two hours a week and are open to all
The
dead been burled in unmarked graves students of the University.
Elongated Red Hukle: "Freshman,
lest the Indians peeping over the lit- course in the psychology of advertisyou had my toothache."
I wish
. "Huh,"
chuckled the Freshman, "if tle hill at Plymouth could tell what ing will be compulsory for Sophomores in Journalism.
my teeth were behind a face like few of them were left."
Dr. Tigert will also offer a course
He told the story of the little boy,
they'd ache all the time.
yours
at night in advertising to the business
men of Lexington.
ALL-CLAS-

"ONLY THE 1E8T

OPEN 10 A. M. TO 11 P.M.
Children, 9c pfaslc wtr'Ux
Adults,18cplus 2c war tax

"THE BEST ORCHESTRA IN THE SOUTH"

COACHES PICK U. K.

HOME

,

PARAMOUNT, ARTCRAFT, GOLD-WYAND SELECT PICTURES

N

THE CLASSY PLACE

DOCTOR BUSH GIVES

s

OF

IN MOVING PICTURES"

FOR THE COLLEGE STUDENTS
HOME-MAD-

CANDIES AND LUNCHES

E

McGurk & O'Brien
"EVERYTHING NEW"

PHOENIX FRUIT STORE
FOR FRUITS, CANDIES, NUTS
PHOENIX BLOCK
A TIP FROM BECK

Why worry about Clothes?

New Clothes are so high right now that we all
can't afford to buy them and to those who can't
just get out one of the old suits that you have and
send it here, it will be just the thing to wear to a
dance, party or school call.
BECKER DRY CLEANING CO.
Cleaners That Satisfy
Lime at High
Phone 621-X

Cropper's Laundry
(Incorporated)

PHONE 210

114 N. UPPER

HERE'S YOUR CHANCE.

DO YOU DANCE?

MRS. LAMBERT'S SCHOOL OF DANCING
Every Afternoon 1 to 5
8 to 10:30

Tuesday and Thursday Evenings

OVER WOMEN'S EXCHANGE
Phone

1809--

Y

Graves, Cox & Co.

ONLY A FEW MORE DAYS OF THE DAMAGE
BY WATER SALE OF MEN'S SHOES
College Men here's your chance to save money on your shoes.
The damage In every case is very slight and does not impair the
permanent wearing qualities or looks of the shoe being no more
than a new pair of shoes would get after being worn out once in
the rain.

BRING YOUR SHOES TO US
TO BE REPAIRED
RIGHTWAY
114 North Limestone

SHOE STORE

The Christmas Store for
Men and Boys.

Great display of practi
cah useful gifts now
ready.

N. LEVY, Manager

Street

yourself a new,
warm Suit or Overcoat
extra values now.
Give

TRIANGLE CLUB
Invites you to attend their

WEEKLY DANCES
Wednesday and Saturday Evening, at 8:30 p. m.
Over Ladies' Exchange, North Upper St.

Graves, Cox & Co.
Incorporated.

Montague's Orchestra
Admission $1.00
COMMITTEE
JOHN MARKING

HERBERT NUNNELLY

RAY McCOWAN
4..

* THE KENTUCKY KERNEL

PAGE 3

THANKSGIVING COMES
TO

PATTEOI

HALL

ill

Turkey, Cranberry Sauce in
and Mince Meat Pie Add
to Good Time

The College Store
For College People

Freshmen,

"old timers," returned
and other visitors all
agreed that Thanksgiving Day at Patterson Hall this year was one of the
most enjoyable occasions experienced
this year.
After a delightfully lato breakfast,
the girls assembled In the Recreation
Hall for a brief but most impressive
Thanksgiving service, led by Louise
Will, assisted by Margarot Woll and
Martha Pollltt. This was followed by
a scattering of the crowd to meet
trains bringing guests, or to attend
services at the various churches in
Lexington.
By noon, all had returned, and
what happened then is told by an
enthusiastic Patt. Hallite as follows:
"A3 we entered, a pleasant sight
greeted our eyes in the entresalle.
There were girls and girls big ones,
little ones, laughing ones, serious
ones, blondes and brunettes; and Just
as many kinds of clothes. There was
every color in the rainbow represented in these exquisite gowns. There
was the bright music of voices and
much laughter.
Passing through this melange of
feminity, we heard the bell ringing
for lunch. Entering the dining room
we found it presented a very different
apaspect from its usual noon-dapearance. The tables were bedecked
with orange and black napkins. Little nutbaskets of the same colors filled with nuts were at each plate. The
lucky maidens had brought their
many colored bouquets of roses,
chrysanthemums and other flowers to
decorate their respective tables.. And
such a repast of edibles, such as turkey, cranberries, celery, fruit mince
pie, has never been equalled at old
Patt. Hall.
After a wonderful repast and 'a
wonderful time the girls gave fifteen
rahs to Miss Stevens and Mrs. Brown.
Hearing faint echoes of. Kentucky!
Kentucky! Kentucky! Kentucky! coming from the distance, the girl3 rushed to the windows overlooking the
football field, and saw that the clans
of Kentucky and Tennessee were
gathering for their annual clash, a
wild rush was made for tbe gridiron
to witness the Wildcats trounce the
Volunteers.
"has-beens,- "

y

POSTGRADUATE MED. MAY Ol
TAIN TRAINING IN AMERICAN
UNIVERSITIES.
(Univ. of Penn.)
Pennsylvania is among the pioneer
universities of the country to take up
edu
the movement of
cation along medical lines. Before
the war, American physicians were
forced to go to Europe for their
study, but now they can be accom
modated in their own colleges. Be
side3 the one at Philadelphia, other
medical schools are
planned for Now York, Chicago, Boston and some of the other larger
cities.
e

Down Town

r u ci
tt:
university duuk oiurc

Meeting Place

I

for

I

University Boys

Text Books

Open Until 8 P. M. Every Evening

Pennants

High Class
Haberdashery

Kodak Books

Fountain Pens
Basement Main
Building: University

I

College Boys Styles in Our Special Designed Clothes

DOBBS FIFTH AVENUE HATS
MANHATTAN SHIRTS

Down Town Store
233 West Short

I

Most Complete Assortment of Silk Shirts
We Earnestly Solicit Your Patronage

Geddes & Luigart

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WE BELIEVE IN YOUR WILDCATS

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AUTOMOBILES
KELLY SPRINGFIELD
SOLID AND PNEUMATIC TIRES
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Phoenix Block
GEO. GEDDES

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"Let's Get Acquainted"

BP

Ours is the Quality Shop
The finest and most complete exclusively retail Optical establishment
anywhere in the South.
A faithful and accurate Optical Service in all its branches.
EYES examined by an Optometrist intimately familiar with the most
intricate problems of refraction.
The grinding of the lenses, the expert fitting and all other details
are accomplished within our establishment.
x

AND SUPREME AUTO OILS

WE FEATURE ONE DAY SERVICE

DROP IN AND SEE US

Fayette Optical Shop
313-31-

Mammoth Garage Co.

Lexington, Ky.

Phone 3972

W. Main St.

5

H. CLAY

ODENBAUQH,

Optometrist

(Incorporated)

EAST MAIN ST.

R. S. WEBB, Pres.

0.

WELSH & MURRAY PRINTING
COLLEGE STATIONERY

GRADDY-RYA-

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ENGRAVING

CO.

AND

Incorporated

DIE STAMPING

THE COLLEGE BOYS' STORE

FRAT and DANCE PROGRAMS
Clothing, Furnishings, Hats, Shoes and Tailoring

N. LIMESTONE

124-12- 8

LEXINGTON,

KY.

e

OF SOUTH CAROLINA GIRLS
WANT Y. W. C. A.
At a meeting of the
Club at
the University of North Carolina the
decided to take up Y. W. C. A.
work through that society. Until a
dormitory is established for the girls
Y
of the University a regular
C. A. Association Is Impossible.
U.

Co-e-

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Ladies' and Gents' Tailors

Aeolian-Vocallo-

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ulldlni, 2nd Fleer
Lexington, Ky.

C92

Records
Mimical

Established
1899

Instruments

Player Rolls
Sheet Music

Everything Pertaining to Music
Moving, Tuning, Repairing and Refinishing

Competent Home Tailors
Unltn Bank

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PHONE

The E. C. Christian Music Co.

P. ANGELUCCI

co-e- d

co-e-

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Player Pianos
Columbia Grafonolas

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* THE KENTUCKY KERNEL

PAGE 4

PH.

THE KENTUCKY KERNEL

OHIHREIk

Published ovory Friday throughout tho Collogo yenr by tho student body
of tho University of Kentucky, for the benoflt of the students,
nlunini nnd faculty of tho Institution.
The Kentucky Kernel is the official newspaper of the University. It
is issued with n view of furnishing to its subscribers nil the college news
of Kentucky, together with a digest of items of interest concerning the
Universities of other States nnd Canada.
SUBSCRIPTION, ONE DOLLAR AND FIFTY CENT8 A YEAR.
FIVE CENTS THE COPY.
mall matter.
Entered at Lexington Postofflce 83 second-clasEDITORIAL STAFF.
-- EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

Managing Editor
Assistant Managing Editor
Editor
Squirrel Food Editor
Sport Editor
.Exchange Editor
Feature Editor
--

Robert Raiblo
Adele Slade
Mary Elizabeth James.
Donald Dinning
Margaret McClure
Frances Marsh

Co-e- d

REPORTERS.
Elizabeth Marshall,. Elizabeth Card, Mary Archer Boll, James A. Dixon,
Margaret Smith, Martha Buckman, Harry Cottrell, Terril Corn.
BUSINESS STAFF.
Business Manager
J. P. Barnes
H. B. Loyd
Circulation Manager
Assistants
J. Burton Prewitt, Gilbert Smith
:

WHERE LIES THE TROUBLE?
Now that the football season is over and there is a short Interval before
the actual beginning of the basketball season, it may be well to stop and
take stock of ourselves, our team and the results of the gridiron season Just

closed. The season on the whole has not been unsuccessful although more
games have been lost than won. The Wildcats have had an unusually hard
schedule, playing not only strong teams, but the strongest In the country.
Notwithstanding this, there has been an undercurrent of dissatisfaction and
dissentionamong members of the team that has not tended toward good
teamwork, and a general attitude of disappointment .visible among students
of football and alumni of the Institution who have been close followers of
Wildcat football teams In the past and that of this season. They are offering no censure for any one defeat or upon any one man or men, but are
seeking an explanation for the play and results of the entire season and the
reason for the dissatisfied attitude seemingly taken by members of the
team and their supporters, which caused seven promising men to desert the
team during the season, and provoked the question throughout the State
"What is the matter with the Kentucky team?"
No sane supporter of the Blue and White would seek an explanation for
the defeat by Centre other that the team was defeated by the best football
machine ever organized in the State. Neither would a loyal fan condemn
the Wildcats for defeats at the hands of such teams as Indiana and Ohio.
But these have been too decisive for Wildcat loyalty to endure, and there is
a current feeling that the sting of defeat could have been lessened If certain
steps had been taken. The Cincinnati game was also a severe disappointment
to all Kentuckians, bringing defeat by a team really of Inferior ability, and
again raising the question, "Why?"

The Kentucky Colonel says: "Don't
you ovoh quarrel with an angry pus-soA soft nnswnh is always best.

The Bible commands it nnd besides It
makes 'em mnddah than anything you
could say."
Professor
Melcher begs to announce that he Is the custodian of
another lady's pocket book,
(We
,
you
don't mean that exactly,
know what we mean!) Don't crowd,
girls, it contains practically nothing
except the usual powder-puf- f
and private papers, one of which is covered
with notes from an English lecture.
It reads: "Dante fell in love at the
age of nine years. Nine good heavStep up and identify your
ens!"
property.
but-oh-

Bob Lavln has learned the sorority
grip. According to Bob this grip has
several unusual features. Follow instructions and see for yourself. Grip
the left shoulder with the right hand
and the right shoulder with the left
hand then clinch. Now the question
is, who taught Bob?

Mademoiselle on Dit "You crazy
The idea of your kissing me
when you aren't even engaged to
me!"
Knight of the Lex. Drug "Well, a
man gets tired of kissing the girls
he's engaged to."
boy!

Know-it-a-

ll

best-lookin-g

before-mentione- d

The Kernel believes its mission on the campus is frank discussion of
the students' affairs; to prevent, it possible, injustice to their common cause;
to advance the interests of its "public," the student body, at all times and
in the face of any opposition. Therefore The Kernel, believing that more
should have been expected of its team during the season of 1919, desires to
seek out the one cause that worked against the success of the team and
remove that cause. If it be one man on the eleven who has prevented victory,
let him be removed. If it be one man on the Athletic Committee who has
been to blame, let him be removed. If it be the fault of a coach, let him
be removed. If it be a lack of misunderstanding between student body and
team, between Athletic Committee and team or between coach and team,
be sought out and the cause of it removed forthwith. Whether any one man may be the unconscious stumbling block of the
Wildcats, cannot enter into Tho Kernel's discussion. His Ignorance of his
fault could not remove the effects of that fault. Tho Kernel wants a winning team and ask3 that every possible step be taken to get one and to
remove any obstacle in the path to success.
Incidentally this paper desires to express for the student body its profound appreciation of tho loyal efforts of those members of the Athletic organization, its alumni friend, and especially tho team, who fought wholeheartedly to tho end and shall hold them forever in affectionate regard.

let that misunderstanding

TJio University ofj Michigan has
just hnd an impressive illustration of
the present lack of appeal of faculty
positions to those who are unnblo
to livo on education alone. It seems
Incredible that a doctor of philosophy
should reject a position In the disRAVINGS OF A MANIAC.
University of Michigan
Hold her Newt, she's headed for tho tinguished
and should prefer to retain a position
silo.
where bags of meal and sacks of
Your letter, dear, is thoroly red
bran are tho units of measure. Yet
came in tho nicotine.
It
such Is the case. Owing to the unA Bolshevik flow up tho creek
expected influx of students, it has
Where has our navy bean?
been necessary for the state univerMy cigar I smoke no longer
sity authorities to secure additional
For it has smoked so short
instructors; bo telegraphic invitations
So still it rains; the window palnB
were sent to a number of men well
To see the leaves depart.
known to possess
the requisite
knowledge and ability. One of these
0 come to mo sweet memory
was a man most excellently equipped
And find a long-los- t
sigh
For a woman's slave is a Job to crave, possessed of the degrees A. B. and
A. M. and Ph. D., and having not only
We drink. When years go buy
a broad and comprehensive knowlIn December
We sunstroke
edge of history but also a command
Summer falls in the spring.
of latin, Greek, Hebrew, Sanscrit,
A mean iflre-flwill catch your eye.
French, German, Spanish and various
1 heard your finger ring.
other dead and
He
was offered an instructorship in
I hear the night afalling
if he would come for nine months
And the sun is "Going West."
The electric "lights"
show
rifle and the salary tendered was $1,500.
The Doctor of Philosophy wired back:
"sights"
".Thanks for the offer. Have a good
I love my "cookie" best
job In a feed store, and guess I'll
My butter-cuis o'er flowing;
stick to it."
insanity.
For
By sheer application of the philFoot-Badope; You cantelope
osophy with which he is so well
With championship at sea.
equipped he could rapidly rise in a
Who wants to
rolling mill, for instance, until he
In your chest
With a "sweet-heartcould earn anywhere from four to
But the moon gets full
seven thousand dollars a year as a
So you throw the dice
head roller.
Even as a rougher,
For any point you want to
stranner-catcheor edger he could
Best throw the shoe-las- t
first.
earn more money than is paid a
FRIZZY.
profiessor and that In the
same
period for which the
LITERARY SOCIETIES great University of Michigan offered
him $1,500.
At a meeting of the Philosophians
Wednesday night a general program
Kappa Pledge Party.
wa3 given. Miss Catherine Reed gave
The pledges of Kappa Kappa Gama reading, Miss Miriam Kincheloe ma entertained dleightfully with an
sang a solo, and Miss Lucille Moore afternoon 'at the home of Jane Greg
read a selection. The committee to ory on Ashland Avenue In honor of
arrange the new Philosophian room the active chapter. The house was
was requested to act immediately, and charming decorated with white chrythe treasurer asked that all dues be santhemums
and delicious refreshpaid as soon as possible.
s
ments of ices, cakes and
in
Percy Mackaye was the theme of double, the colors ot the fraternity,
the Horace-Manmeeting this week, we're served.
Miss Esther Harris discussed Mr,
About a hundred and fifty guests
Mackaye as a" dramatist, and Miss Lil-li- e were present.
Cromwell discussed him as a writ
The hostesses were: Jane Gregory,
er of masques. He was analyzed' as Mary Elizabeth Downing, Henrietta
a poet by Miss Anna Russell Moore. Rogers, Elizabeth Hays, Lucy Holt,
The meeting was held in the new Julia Willis, Lena Withers, Sarah
Horace-Manroom.
Blanding, Polly Prewitt and Viola
At the regular meeting of the Pat Lewis.
terson Literary Society last Friday
evening the program was devoted to
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
discussion of the effects of war on lit
The Democrats at Frankfort are not
erature. George Gregory made a talk cheered by the thought that their
on "War Poetry," which he concluded "Black" days will be over when the
by reading one of the better poems ''Morrow" comes.
written about the war. Arthur L.
Press dispatches announce
Hodges gave a short talk on "Alan
is running again, but it's not for
Segeer, Man and Poet."
the presidency this time.
After the regular program a round
Apropos the old saying, "It never
table discussion was held on the coal rains but it pours," It sure poured
strike, which brought out many points when Old John Barleycorn reigned.
of interest.
The man who bought a barrel of
Plans for tho declamation contest water may not have a white elephant
to be held soon were presented by on his hands as It is pretty dry below
the secretary and names of three men the Rio Grande.
were voted on for membership.
y

hl3-tor- y

p

He-bre-

ll

"exam-a-nation- ;"

"

r,

nine-mont- h

Senior: Some of the coeds have decided that Jack Howard
man on the camis the
pus.
Many reasons may be advanced for big scores against us and dearth
"Well," growled the Freshman, "it
of victories hung on our belt. There may have been insufficient material
must have been on on