xt7dnc5sbh54 https://exploreuk.uky.edu/dips/xt7dnc5sbh54/data/mets.xml The Kentucky Kernel Kentucky -- Lexington The Kentucky Kernel 1991-12-09 Earlier Titles: Idea of University of Kentucky, The State College Cadet newspapers  English   Contact the Special Collections Research Center for information regarding rights and use of this collection. The Kentucky Kernel  The Kentucky Kernel, December 09, 1991 text The Kentucky Kernel, December 09, 1991 1991 1991-12-09 2020 true xt7dnc5sbh54 section xt7dnc5sbh54  

Vol. XCIV, No. 236

Established 1894

 

University of Kentucky. Lexington, Kentucky

Kentucky Kernel

Independent since 1971

Monday, December 9, 1991

UK Senate to debate governor’s appointment

By GREGORY A. HALL
Associate Editor

The University Senate will vote
today on a resolution calling for
Gov. Wallace Wilkinson's resigna-
tion from the UK Board of Trustees.

Members of the Senate Council
drafted the resolution Friday. said
Senate Chairman Marcus McEllis-
trem.

“That resolution or a ntodified
fomi of it is likely to pass almost
unanimously," McEllistrem said.
However, he said there are two
sides regarding whether Wilkinson
should be asked to step down, anti
McEllistrem could not guarantee if
that would be included in the final-
ized resolution.

The senate meets today at 3 pm.
in the nursing building auditorium.
UK President Charles Wethington
also is scheduled to address the sen—
ate.

Wilkinson. whose term as gov-
emor ends at midnight, appointed
himself last week to a six-year term
on the UK board. replacing former
Gov. A.B. “Happy" Chandler. who
died in June.

The trustees meet tomorrow at 9
am. on the 18th floor of Patterson
Office Tower.

McEllistrem said the controversy
resulting from the appointment
“does neither Gov. Wilkinson or
the University any good." The self-
appointment was an abuse of public
policy, he added,

“The principle reason from my
point of view is that it has the flavor
of an abuse of the policy established
by Gov. (Wendell) Ford in 1972.“

in 1972. Ford and the legislature
passed a law removing the sitting
governor as chairman of the UK
board. The intent of the move was
to de-politicize the University.

“We think that it is important for
higher education to stay out of poli-
tics and, conversely, that politics
stay out of higher education,"
McEllistrem said.

McEllistrem said he fears Wilkin-
son will use the seat as a “bully pul-
pit" to run for governor in 1995.
“We don’t think the University

See SENATE. Page 5

 

Judge hears legal arguments on case

By GREGORY A. HALL
Associate Editor

FRANKFURT, Ky. w Frank~
lin Circuit Court Special Judge
Reed Rhorer is expected to an-
nounce today whether he will
grant a temporary injunction pre-
venting Gov. Wallace Wilkinson

from serving on UK’s Board of

Trustees.

Rhorer’s decision could spark a
daylong legal battle ending at the
state Supreme Court.

 

Kentucky Attorney General
Fred Cowan filed a suit 'l hursday
challenging Wilkinson's self-
appointment to the board, which
meets tomorrow. Cowart asked
for a non-appealable restraining
order, but on Friday decided iii-
stead to ask for art appealiible
temporary llllllnc’llflll

On Friday tlte two sides pre»
sented their cases ~ occasionally
producing barbs between (owan
and Loursvrlle attorney Charles
(‘assis Wilkinson's attorney

(‘owati argued that Wilkinson \
appointment ytolatcd public port
t\, But (ussls said the ."tlf' .
should not make publit polity
"Public policy is .i ii .i.rir,'
power.” he stitd

Cowtitt argued for the rilltllic
tion on the grounds that irrx triis
fees will consider budget cut to
morrow lie said Wilkinson coulii
inflict irreparable harm in ten hit
the budget ' is ill {iii-

See WILKINSON PM” ‘3

C’s‘st‘llc r:

 

 

MEET THE FLINTSTONES

 

 

Susan Duncan, Torn Fouls and

By LYNNE CARMODY
Contributing Writer

When 13 flint knappers and 510
pounds of obsitiian stone met at
UK last week. the result was both
educational and bloody.

The firm krtappers people
who bash rocks together to create
stone tools ,, came to UK front all
over the country to participate in a
workshop arid conference on illh‘
it, or stone, technology.

They spent part of last week usv
irtg rocks and deer attd moose ant-
lers to fashion stone tools. The
process can be hazardous.

“Cutting yourself is just one of
the hazards of the trade." said '1 er-
ry Ozbun. a flitit knapper from
Washington who was wearing four
bandages on his hands.

“’lltc cutting tools that we pro-
duce are extremely sharp. They
were used to slice through hide
tutti to cut up animal carcasses,"
he said,

Despite the bloodshed, confer-
ence participants said the work
shop was worth the cost.

Susan Duncan, 24, a UK anthro»
pology graduate student and one
of the participants in the lltitt
knappirtg. said the workshop will

 

GREG EANSKernel Sta”

Rob Hand participate in a work-

shop and conference on lithic technology

UK hosts conference
on lithic technology

help her understand more about are
tii’acts anti stone tools she finds
during field work.

“I want to get this hands—on ex-
perience anti leant how [)l’OJCCIIiC
points and other stone tools were
made so when I go to a site where
there is evidence of rtiartufacture
['11 have some idea of what l'rn
looking at," said Duncan, who
also sported four bandages.

The “evtdence" Duncan refers
to is called dcbrtage or debris anti
the analysis of it was the focal
point of tire workshop and confer»
ence, 'lhe flakes artti chips found
at prehistoric sites cart be analyzed
by archaeologists to tell what kind
of tools were made.

’l‘om Dillehay, a UK archaeolo-
gist who spoke at the conference,
said the study of stone tool tech~
nology reveals aspects of human
behavior.

“it reflects on economics and re-
sources and how people used
them. it lets us look at how hu-
mans occupied a site," he said.

Teresa 'l‘une. an archaeologist
front the state Office of Mining
and one of about 50 people who
attended the conference. praised

See STONE. Page 5

 

 

 

the obsrdian storte must be struck at rust the right angle by the flint mapper

used on the lap for protection.

 

htl s; t/XNS ‘u .

'i’te lirtilfltfl L tlti

i
r

 

Portrait of past UK

BY JOE BRAUN
Staff Writer

The lobby of Kuwait I‘ower was
transformed into a lavish banquet
ltall yesterday for the unveiling arid
placement of a photo portrait iii
honor of Albert l). Kitwan, a for
rrter UK president

New carpet was laid III the lobby.
photos of the University were
placed on the walls. and banquet ta;
bles were adorned with ptnttsettias

to create atmosphere for the lln\Cli'
ing ceremony

An added touch to the ceremony
was the presence of i‘l’llllk Dickey.
also a former UK president. who
spoke about about his relationship
with Kuwait.

“lie was an individual who loved
students anti was very ruuclt devot
ed to this tiniyersity and as a cottse‘
qtience it seems to me it‘s tnost tip»
propriate that his portrmt be ltete tn
Kirwan lower because he did serve

Students
fed tip with
false alarms
at Kirwan

By BRIAN BENNETT
Conforming Wrr‘er

trsrtn Mitts: was be“ ”*5
l

essay for .rrs. English she.
33rd floor of Kirwrir‘
he hearti :t f.irtiiltar
night

it” liti‘ second llllit‘ r!
.ind the Uni \illcC iii-s -- :xwd‘"
i't'in. \iiller and other l" l 'l
:r fi‘\ltit‘lil\ i‘:-.‘i it ~ '1‘l_‘
i‘tllitill t' b '. :riw‘

*r

,tidr'l‘

ll ils‘llllir' r-.‘.li". sr lI
stiid I\irller .i brisrni's- fras‘v"
eels old red List "

last wfelt in this KWZLJH it
lobby. resident :idVi "r (Lu: ' \\ >2
lace conducted :i meetirie to 'xt‘iar't

, v

the {lilil‘lliti 1:" term it w .‘
‘l‘il of ti" it. v
i~‘-ll litita‘ i"-"l it
’fili .il the in. s-.i.‘tv Y!!~"‘?‘
' l=il|llf"i‘s u' ‘
r'rr firs“ :ii it"rs if
\i‘parentb ‘Hf‘i'.
pillirii: ll.‘ ‘li.ll'lll ~
\\:tii.i‘ e ~ir‘ l. '
His
iii\‘.\t‘{ i, i
iiil i

\4l i

..ifll

’ii‘ ‘--‘\lliti
.i..irtti. ‘!

l‘est‘ite if.“ Ligt‘ lit: “is. ' .r, a;
.- .irrtis Aimee JUAN:
A: ‘tflllltl tit. alarm ll: ’ili\

‘-ii fi..‘\t‘ iii tituit cut» 5-.1 .':‘
l: lll\ ' \‘ ‘E
“l.' i‘l.i\ 'i\ ty \ ’lf ii iii’ ': “
1p

if}

lils'

iii’rrrt'tn

' ill2i\. t‘ ‘ lt it‘ll'vc ~
fen i- .l "
ill ‘ .‘.vr

'i rt‘ipcrtiiiitt

ruched 9"

"‘itttiti‘s. tilc

ti lLlJcN
'14'lil \\ t\ ;
litiflics

¥\ ciiiilc'c sittti tl'iitm
i-ikltll

kits. .i'.irr;rs. .li\i fr.

.\l\\.\i ’1‘

~_.tl\\ ,‘itlil\ i“‘ if slums. .

scl‘v in‘s‘ citillii \ \ltxi.

\t‘lilsi {Li‘it it I" . l."i i

lbs/Urn“. r

president dedicated in Kuwait "lower

this liniyersity for a number of

\ ears," Dickey said.

Dickey said Kirwtin scrycd the
l‘llht‘lsll) iii a number of L'tlptltlr
ties, not only as an administrator

“lie setycd as a coach. professor.
.is heart, as President and served
with great distinction itt all those
capacities."

Kuwait lower. .i residence hall
that is home to about (sit) students,
was dedicated to Krrwtin tti I903.
Ktrwan was appointed interim UK

president that year to fill the \tl\tllll
seat of lorrner president lohri \\.
Oswald, who resigned.

Kll\\.lll .ilso setxttl .ts .tl ls loot
ball touch, Dean of \lett. Dean of
the Graduate St hool .rnd .rs .i h.sto
l')‘ lt‘tltllt‘l’.

Betty KirwarL wife of the i.ilc -\l
bcrt Klr\\.lll, stttd \esletduy‘s re
ccption was “absolutely l‘t‘dllllllll ‘

She also said her husband we‘d
be ”\ety pleased" with the l‘i‘llidll
that is now displayed in his honor

and with the “its:
\iL‘lis C iitlii
lit‘l

.oriditior. \‘i the

iiiiic :li

.1rs.ipt‘i:
“lillililli

t‘lii‘.

students had .srrrrcn .ir. writ.
w.ills.'~ she said

\hi‘rtiy .il‘icr .flitsllli_ .it liit' t
ttiony. \lts Klinhlf!

\isit the top that: .‘t the itiritlur; :ri

"‘iltit'sl. .: l"

\ ie\\ the . .iirit‘irs
Kink?
.ilf.iir- inf

lame».
strident
verv

\,ts "\

t‘tt’tlt'ti "‘ we ”re l‘f‘"l.f“

i

“.t i'iir=.iiric \

-ii\ll i i'iil il.llitt .ytilli ._ ,
“suturing t. rttiici. h. ‘.
l t‘iirik .ti‘r t‘: its rand tr
untitled that .r lwt tit tiled! ,c. , 1c

L‘t‘li‘i r'ls r.ili_i\\i‘ii. il\\illill\,1i'
".i»...i .i

A,“ ‘i.

.-..t i‘l '

lel-\il.’;

tree KlRWAN. their, .4

 

SPORTS

 

UK TODAY

 

INDEX

 

 

Wildcats Deron Feldhaus and Jamal Mash-
burn lead UK to a 76-74 victory over the In-
diana Hoosiers. Story, Page 4.

 

The University Senate meets at 3 pm. in the
auditorium of the nursing building.

‘Unbelievable
Discoveries‘
examined.
Column, Page 3.

 

 

 

I

f
thyelmzns

 

.0,
id

\chi
K, liliiuiilt‘kls

Viewpoutl

 

  

  
 
 

  
   
   
 
  
  
   
    
   
    
   
  
     
  
  
 
  
  
  
   
 
   
    
   
 
  
  
 
  
  
  

 
 
 
  

2 - Kentucky Kernel, Monday, December 9, 1991

    

 

m

m - us Calendar

  

 

 

 

       
   
    

ART & MOVIES

Monday 12/9

- Exhibit Frank W Long, '01 Mountains

and Music' UK Art Museum; thru 12 22.
call 7-5716

- Exhibit 'Ornaments, Artist Made': The

Galbreath Gallery: thru 1’3’92; 8am-6pm
Mon-Fri. Sam-130m Sat. call 254-4579

Tuesday 12/1 0

- SAB Movre. 'Bugsy‘. premiere. tree. Wors-

ham Theater: 8pm: call 7-8867

- Luncheon Lecture: Jan Arnow, "SOuthern
Craits'. $15. The Headley Whitney Mu-
seum noon, ca» 255-6653

Thursday 12/12
- Movre. Miskatonic Student Union Movre.
Student Center, room 113. 7pm

Friday 12:13

- Performance. Lexmgton Philharmonic Or-
chestra. 'The Messrah'. $24. $21,
SCFA Concert Hat 80m caii 233—4226

Saturday 12:14

- SAB Movre. 'Father of the Bride', pre-
mrere tree. Worsham Theater: 8pm. cail 7-
8867

. Performance. Lexmgton Philharmonic Or-
chestra. ”The Messiah'. S24. $21, $18, $15:
SCFA Concert Hail: 80m. cali 233-4226

Sunday 1215

- Performance. Centra: Kentucky Youth Or-
chestras. Hoiiday Program; tree. SCFA
Concert Hail. 7pm: call 7-4929

- MUSIC in the Museum: School for Creative
and Penorming Arts Chorus, 'Holiday Cho-
rai MUSic“ tree wrth admrssron to the mu-
seum; The Headley-Whitney Museum.
30m: caii 255-6653

SAB MOVIE PREMIE

BUGSY
IITUESDAY12/9,8:O| .m

&

FATHER OF HE BRIDE
SATURDAY 12/14, 8:00pm
_ FREE
0*
egg}?

SHAM THEATRE
gig-5 CALL 7-8867

 

 

 

 

, MEETINGS & LECTURES
Monday 12.9

- Meeting. MiSkatonic Student Union: tree
Student Center, room 113. 6pm

- Meeting UK HEMP Meeting, tree. Oi‘c
Student Center. room 111. 7.30:).m

Tuesday 12,10

- Lecture 'Bone Mar'ow Transptant.' 0'
Jean. Hensiee Downey. Free. Rm 230 St
Center, 4-5pm. call 7-8314

- Meeting, Cycling Club, tree, Seaton Cen-

 

  
 
 
    

 

iiIN 90.1569

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.......

 

lntormation on this calendar at events is collected from the Student ACTIV'IIeS
on the Calendar a Campus Calendar Form must be tilled Out at

$18 $15;

 
 

PROD

7%

 

 

  

 

Monday 12/9
- Volunteer: UK Student Volunteer Center needs your hetp', come to
Mathews Bldg, room 2068 or cail 7-8785 to find out how you can vol-

untee'

EXECUTIVE PRODUC

r .:
.. ‘ uh LL.

 
 
  

UCED by U. K. EXPERIMENTAL MEDIA/ VIDEO LAB
ER. Professor Shawn Brixey

}~-~-‘ ."

:iAnessa Arehart
gm

  

Ed Boland
5.“-

narra- ' if

Ruthie Hurlbutt

:9u‘

sleeie -

0.. § Gordon Gilder
_Lee Ann Holt _

LIV

 

“Mi

Kathleen Keys

h‘ ‘. s‘£'-~'M

i; Anne Marshall
‘ m
«.E ihraim McD
Janet Nason . ‘
W“ K

r

  

\
p‘
b
r

//I:

”MW

owell .. 5.

.. 3,,; Cindy Norton 3’

Car‘l‘l’iwmskv
ziie' Schoenbor

Iii-Mn Turner

Marcv Werner

I,“ 91“» 13.

 

 

,, \, gp‘emgl'l‘hanks

 

SPECIAL EVENTS

 

 

 

206. 4-5,)

. Food Drive LCC's Food Drive for God's Pantry; LCC main lobby
and Student Organization Center, 1850C. all day thru Dec 12

- Santa Calis It you would like Santa to phone your child, pick up a
torm in room 145 Seaton Center Children, ages 3-7 years, of UK or

LCC students, tactilty, or statt are eligible (tnru 12’13)

- Holiday Concert/Reception: Donovan Chorus.
Student Center Theater. 3—4pm; Reception-St Center. room
C(iii 78314

*

ll

 
 

Frida Decernb

401d Student Center Theatre
7. Showin sat 8:00 mand 10:00 In
'- x‘ All proceeds support U. K. 5 Experimental Medial Video Lab

:0 Barney Millers. Fine Arts Chairman.
ean Oink Arts, Chancellor of the Lexington Campus

er 13th

 

$1.00

Thursday 12/14
Concert-Old

Sunday 12/15

- Readings, “A Festivai of Lessons and Carols, the Cathedral
Chorrs and readers from the community. Christ Church Cathe-
dral: 5pm. call 254-4497

 

 

 

 

SPORTS
Monday 12’9

- Campus Rec deadiine to sign up tor
Hot Shot Competition, Seaton Center,
145. 4p"). caii 7 2898

vr\(\m
14..

Tuesday 12/10
- UK Basketball W:ld(.i1t5‘i/ Southwest
Texas State Rupp Arena 8pm

Wednesday 12/11
- Campus Rec Hot Shot COMpetition.
Seaton Center. 6pm. cal. 7 2898

Thursday 12/12
- UK Basketball Wildcats v Morehead
. tate, Rupp Arena. 8pm

Saturday 1214
- UK Basketball Wildcats v Arizona State.

Rupp Arena, 8pm

WEEK AT A GLANCE

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

MONDAY
~ Exhibit: Frank W. Long. 'Ot Mountains
and Music
. Exhibit: ‘Ornaments, Artist Made’; The
Galbreath Gallery
- Campus Rec: deadline to slgn up
for Hot Shot Competition

TUESDAY

. SAB Mowe; ‘Bugsy‘, premiere
. Luncheon Lecture: Jan Amow. ‘Southern
Cratts’

as State

 

WEDNESDAY

1/2 OF THE WAY
TO FINALS "it"

I I I I I I
- Campus Rec.: Hot Shot Competition:
Seaton Center;

THURSDAY

- Movre: Miskatonic Student Union Movie;

- UK Basketball: Wildcats v Morehead
State

- UK Basketball. Wildcats v Southwest Tex-

FRIDAY

- Pertormance: Lexington Philharmonic Or-
chestra. “The Messiah

SATURDAY

- SAB Movie: ‘Father of the Bride
~ Performance. Lexington Philharmonic Or-
chestra, 'The Messrah'

. UK Basketbalt' witdcats v Arizona State

SUNDAY

- Performance: Central Kentucky Youth Or-
chestras

- Music in the Museum: School for Creative
and Performing Ans Chorus

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Board Room 203. 204 Student Center, University of Kentucky. The lnlormation is published as supplied by the on- campus sponsor For Student Organizabons or University Departments to make entries
the Student Activnies Oltice Subrmssron 01 photographs or graphics is encouraged' DEADLINE Entries must reach the Student Act/Vines O‘Iice no later than a week pad: to publican‘on!

.L, L..'

 

 

 

Monday 12/9

PLEASE NOTE: SOME MEETINGS MAY
BE CANCELLED DURING DEAD WEEK
- Weekly meetings: Water Ski Team 81
Club; Free; Rm 106 St. Center; 9pm; call
253-3723

- Weekly meetings: SAB Cinema Comm;
Free; Rm 228 St. Center; 5pm; call 7-
8867

- Weekly meetings: Aikido; Alumni Lott:
8:30pm; call 273-9877

Tuesday 12/10

PLEASE NOTE: SOME MEETINGS MAY
BE CANCELLED DURING DEAD WEEK
- Weekly meetings: SAB Concert Commit-
tee; Free; Rm. 228 New St. Center; 3pm;
call 7-8867

- Weekly meetings: SAB Indoor Rec.
Comm; Free; Rm 115 St. Center;
6:15pm: call 7-8867

- Weekly meetings: UK Ultimate Frisbee;
Free; Stoil Field; 5:30pm; call 8-2686

- Weekly meetings: Chess Club; Free;
Rm 117 St. Center; 4:30-10pm: call 887-
2574

- Weekly meetings: Catholic Newman
Center Open Student Meeting; Free;
Newman Center, Apt. 8: 11am; call 255-
8566

. Weekly meetings: UK Ballroom Dance
Society; $5 per semester; Barker Hall,
dance studio; 7-9pm; call 277-0664

- Weekly meetings: Writer's Bloc Weekly
Meetings; tree; Old St. Center, room 117;
7pm; respond to box in 1215 POT

- Weekly meetings: Society for Creative
Anachronism; tree; Student Center, room
117: 7pm; call 223-5870

Wednesday 12/11

PLEASE NOTE: SOME MEETINGS MAY
BE CANCELLED DURING DEAD WEEK
- Weekly meetings: Canterbury Fellow-
ship, Holy Communion; St. Augustine's
Chapel; 5:30pm: call 254-3726

- Weekly meetings: Encounter; Free; Rm
205, New St. Center: 7pm; caII 276-2362
- Weekly meetings: S.A.V.E. meeting;
Free; Rm 309, Old St. Center: 7pm

- Weekly meetings: Aikido; Alumni Lott;
8:30pm: call 273-9877

Thursday 12/12

PLEASE NOTE: SOME MEETINGS MAY
BE CANCELLED DURING DEAD WEEK
- Weekly meetings: SAB Spotlight Jazz
Comm: Free: Rm 204 Old St. Center;
5pm; call 7-8867

- Weekly meetings: SAB Performing Arts
Collective Meeting; Free; St. Center
Room 202: 4pm; call 7-8867

- Weekly meetings: UK. Ultimate Frisbee:
Free: Stoll Field: 5:30pm: call 8-2686

- Weekly meetings: Canterbury Club-
Episoopal Student Fellowship; St, Augus-
tine's Chapel; 6:30-7:30pm; call 254-3726
- Weekly meetings: Catholic Newman
Center Night; Newman Center; 7:30-
8:30pm: call 255-8566

- Weekly meetings: Thursday Night Live;
Free; 502 Columbia Av.: 7:30pm: call
233-0313

- Weekly meetings: UK Clogging Club.
free; Seaton Center Rm 123: 7-9pm; call
231 -7207

- Weekly meetings: 'lnstitute tor the Heal-
ing of Racism'; tree; Old Student Center,
room 111; 6:30-8:30pm; call 254-2097

Saturday 12/14

PLEASE NOTE: SOME MEETINGS MAY
BE CANCELLED DURING DEAD WEEK
- Weekly meetings: Catholic Sunday
Mass: Free; Newman Center; 6pm; call
255-8566

Sunday 12/15

PLEASE NOTE: SOME MEETINGS MAY
BE CANCELLED DURING DEAD WEEK
- Weekiy meetings: U.K. Ultimate Frisbee;
Free; Stoll Fieid; 5:30pm; call 82686
-Weekly meetings: Canterbury Fellow-
ship. Holy Communion; Free; St Augus-
tine's Chapei. 10.30am and 5:30pm: call
254-3726

- Weekly meetings; Catholic Sunday
Mass; Free; Newman Center; 9 and
11:30am, 5 and 8:30pm: call 255-8566

- Weekly meetings: Spaghetti Dinner, All-
U-Can-Eat; S2; Newman Center; 6pm;
call 255-8566

- Weekly meetings: Universny Praise Ser~
v1ce,Free;502 Columbia Av: UK; 11am.
call 233—0313

- Weekly meetings. Aikido. Alumni Lott;
1pm; call 273-9877

COUPON
Goodfor1oz
of
Sanfly

DECEMBER 16-21

 

 

 
  
  

  

           
         
        
   
          
     
      

    

Kentucky Kernel, Monday, December 9, 1991 - 3

 

 

    

 

Wonderknives: this (and every) week’s topic on ‘Unbelievable’

The other day, while flipping
through the TV dial. I happened on
an interesting talk show — a talk
show called “Unbelievable Break-
throughs." If you haven‘t seen it,
you will. It‘s on virtually every sta-
tion at almost every time of the day
(Talk about a demand!) it‘s a must
see for the talk show fan.

Perhaps you’ve already seen it. It
usually seems to have the same top—
ic —— stainless steel wondcrknives
of the future. What are the odds
they would devote each show to
that same exact topic? I‘m no math—
ematician, but the chances that the
stainless steel wonderknife would
be the topic every single week must
be astronomical. At least NH.

The host and the guest, a well-
rcspected knife guy, had not met be-
fore the show began. Their dialogue
was spontaneous but natural and ef-
fortless - ,_ altnost as if they had
practiced their routine and per»
formed it hundreds of times before,
though of course that was impossi
ble. They clearly said they had nev-
er bet before. I guess they just really
hit it off.

The guest was a culinary master.
craftsman. 'lhc mart could slice,
dice, chop, tritn, filet, carve, and do
everything and anything to every
food in existence — and then some!
lie sliced a potato into chips so thin
an electron microscope was needed
by the deep-fryer. He cut a bell pcp<
per into 50 tiny pieces, each of
which resembled one of the states.
The rugged coast of Maine was un-
mistakable. Let’s face it: this WlIZHtI
could slice and dice soup.

The knives are indestructible.
Shoot it. Run over it with a car.
Pour sulfuric acid on it. Nothing can
stop it. If a nuclear holocaust pul—
veri/ed the human race, survivors

 

Need
to Beef
UP
your
sales?
Advertise
in the
Kernel

    

 

 

 

    

""II‘Q‘W
- v
$43.5“!

     
   
   
     
     

U .

YOU Earn
. EXTRA
gig, CREDIT
(0’9 DOLLARS
it

     
   

    

  
 
 

 

«Wkflhjp
.0"! .1}

‘V_

GE'I'
INSTANT
CASH

Oil/o of l/oor Oflt’o/o/ lloz'oorsz’tg/ Bookstores!

)fi, 9 Whig“?
r afieslpyny

 

lIlIlIII-IIlltlllllll'lIIlI Ill

would crawl out of the rubble and
still be able to slice a tomato into
paper—thin slices for that Sunday af-
tcmoon cookout.

Consequently, the knives are
guaranteed forever. Not for life fl
but forever! Go to the grave with
the satisfaction of knowing that a
future generation could always get
back the $39.95 if they can‘t cut
through a soda can.

Audience members offered spon-
taneous comments. 'lhey stood up
to be interviewed by the host, Don-
ahue‘style. After all, what would a
roomful of strangers rather talk
about than the amazing wonder-
kiiife of the future?

Everyone had a profound c0m<
ment to make, or an old knife-
rclated horror story to tell. (But
don’t we all?) I only regret not be-
ing there to tell some of the knife
tales I used to share around the
camp fire years ago.

The audience members, who sat
mesmerized throughout the (lemon-
strations. all wanted to buy some of
these 21st century knives. But they
went beyond mere desire. They
were compelled to buy the knives.
'lhcy hungered for them. They
couldn‘t control themselves. At cer—
tain points in the discussion, they
stood just off-screen, shoving mon—
ey at the guest. I was afraid the
crowd would turn ugly.

“No, no I don‘t want your
money yet!" the guest insisted.
Why? He had more to offer! The
man never ran out of free bonuses

—- steak knives that could cut
through diamonds, a juicer thinga-
mabob that can suck an orange as
dry as the Sahara. a meat cleaver
that could chop a rhino in half.

Visualize those wondertools in
your own home. You’ll be the envy
of every neighbor as you prepare
detailed meals in record time. Heck,
your life will be perfect! Just dial
the toll-free number, and you‘ll
have enough stuff to all but perform
surgery in your kitchen.

Later, on the street, regular pew

ple were interviewed. They weren't
actors; just the average John and
Betty Citizen strolling around
chewing the fat about the heart-
break caused by shoddy kitchen
utensils. Sadly, they didn't know
about the wonderknif‘e of the fu-
IUTL‘.

They were stuck with the old,
antiquated methods of cutting food.
It‘s a wonderful talk show. The
people are friendly and enthusias-
tic. No chance of getting the shaft
froin these fine folks, norsirce-bohl

 

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Wlesenhahn

Compare,
contrast
Dome life

INDIANAPOLIS -- Coni-
parisons and contrasts com
piled from a day at the Dome.

Basketball under the blg
top

Clad in crimson and white
candy-striped slacks. red
snap-off shirts and white Atl-
didas high tops, the Indiana
Hoosiers strolled onto the
Hoosier Dome‘s temporary
basketball floor Saturday to
warm up. The Wildcats sport-
ed their never-seen-bcfore
blue road uniforms. I'K’s
duds were trimmed in white.
well at least on one side, and
glistened with a silky-like
shimmer. The clown-like
wardrobes seemed appropri-
are given that the game was
played under the facility‘s
eight acre, 257 ton canvas-
like root

Dog pound on the move

The Cleveland Browns
have long taken pride in their
infamous dog pound, a sec—
tion of rowdy Brown tans
staked out in the end zones of
Cleveland Stadium. Saturday.
Hoosier and Wildcat band
members took a stal‘ at imitat-
ing their football counter-
parts, IL' staked out a floor
section behind the north goal
while L'K occupied the south
end lOl’lC seats. The students
cheered, jeered and sought
out every TV' opponunity
CBS afforded them.

Worst seat In the house

.\'o 2”. row I5 west press
mw

Kentucky Kernel sports
once again was given the
grand treatment Positioned
directly behind the [K bench.
reporter's view of the game
was blocked repeatedly in
UK substitute and staff stood
in joy or sorrow. So much for
the front row

Fashions by

IIK coach Rick Piuno
donned his standard navy Ar-
rtiani sun. a pink. white-
collared Ulltlfctl shirt and a
blue and pink silk neck tie, It'
coach Bobby Knight, mean-
while. arrised in a crimson
Addiltts pullover sweater
mm a crimson collared shirt
and khaki slacks A sort of
live version of the Beauty and
LhC Bt‘élsl

Climate controlled
The Hoosier Dorne's roof
is air supported by 20. I00-
horse power fans As a result.
fans are constantly pelted by
a slight breeze. How slight'.’
A [men that is slight enough
to turn notebook pages, tattcr
l'ianricrs and blue knuckles

Bring a sweater next time

State of the art

The game hom. which is
blarcd when time expires or
during substitutions. sounded
more like a but/Cl borrowed
from a high school gym rath-
er than a device befitting the
$77.5 million Hoosier Dome
It rang out with a familiar
“annnnnnn."

The 45-s‘econd shot clock
performed so miserably that
officials were forced to mom»
tor the count by hand and call
out the ume remaining at T
inintis I5 seconds. 10 seconds
and five seconds Twice, an
unknown yoicc bellowed out
the numbers as if were a deity
from the canvas heavens
above As Pitino screamed to
the officials "This wouldn't
have happened in Riipp "

Spurn [dill/f ltm llir’srn
huhn I\ ll [fill/VIIIIHNI and
English 30ml” and a Kernel
sporty Ill/WWII

 

 

4 — Kentucky Kernel, Monday, December 9, 1991

SPORTS MONDAY

Wildcats win 76-74 as IU’s last ‘3’ falls short

Mashbum scores 21,
leads UK to third Victory

 

 

AMY BOVANOWSKI Kernel Sta“

UK's Jamal Mashburn drives to the basket against Indiana's Eric Anderson Saturday in the Hoosier
Dome Mashburn scored 21 points and grabbed eight rebounds in UK's 76-74 win over the Hoosiers.

Marksman Feldhaus shoots true at Indy

By TIM WlESENHAHN
Sports Editor

INDIANAPOLIS —- For the first
51 seconds of the set ond half Satur-
day. I'K withdrew its deadliest
marksman from the battle against
Indiana in the Hoosier Dome. icn-
dering him inoperative on a row of
vinyl-coycrcd folding chairs. The
maneuver must haye been an over-
sight by the I‘K higli command

The marksman, a o-foot-"i. Zill-
pound sixth man tagged Deron
Feldhaus. reigned tear on the Hoo-
Slc‘rs

During I7 minutes of the first
half. Feldhaus hit n7 two-point
targets. He hit targets from three
point range with (le percent accura-
cy. He retrieyed two rebounds and
tallied nine poiiizs

And with a pair of seconds re-
maining before the halftime armis-
tice arrived. l‘t‘ltllltlUs launched a
21-foot shot that reached his riiiietl
orange target and gave t'K a 4-3-13
lCJt’i

“I was feeling good
said

After his nearly minute-long ab-
sencc, Feldhaus was re-deploycd.

I-eldhaus

He took only IX seconds to strike.

Plac‘ing the ball on his hip. Felti-
hatis leahed forward and eyed the
II' defense. He lunged right. drib-
bled and launched a six-foot jurrip
shot from the base line. The shot
was good and gave L'K a 47-40
lead, Marksriian Feldhaus was still
a smoking gun

“Deron Feldhaus is on fire.”
an impressed sports writer

For the next 20 minutes, Feld—
haus attacked the Hoosiers like an
avenger. He stole a pass. grabbed
three rebounds and fired five on—
target three-point bombs. His etfon
was reckless and fiery. An effort so
honorable that it gamered the higli-
est praise from his critics and his
superiors

"Deron Feldhaus is a heck of a
ball player." said still another mem-
ber of the media

“Deron Feldhaus is one of the
most valuable players on this has
ketball team." I'K coach Rick Piti-
no said after I’K‘s‘ victory.

Feldhaus logged 15 minutes of
play. in which he scored 1‘) points
and retrieved three rebounds. All in
the line of duty for UK‘s senior re-
serve forw ard.

said

“You have these days when it
just feels good." he said. “and I felt
like everyone of them (his shots)
was going in. You wish you would
have more days like that."

On most days, however, players
like Feldhaus and his teammates Ri-
chie Farmer anti John Pelphrey are
regarded as no better than average.
Mere mortals. Feldhaus does not
even start

Contrast them with players as
decorated as IU‘s Calbert Cheaney,
who scored lo points: anti Eri