um

Immaturity

What'd you
say?

Are the neighbor's
middle-school
children picking on
you again? Here are
some lines to get
back at them:

Yo mama so stupid. she
thought Hamburger
Helper came with
another person.

Yo mama so stupid, she
thought meow mix
was music for cats.

Yo mama so stupid, she
thought she needed a
token to get on soul
train.

Yo mama so stupid. she
invented a solar-
powered flashlight.

Yo mama so stupid, she
told everyone that
she was
“illegitimate"
because she couldn't
read.

Yo mama so stupid, she
sold the car for gas
money.

Yo mama so stupid. she
ran out of gas leaving
Texaco.

Yo mama so stupid, she
sold the house to pay
the mortgage.

Yo mama so stupid, she
thought Sherlock
Holmes was a
housing project.

Yo mama so stupid, she
went to a Whalers
game to see Shamu.

Yo mama so stupid,
when she saw a
"Wrong Way" sign in
her rearview mirror,
she turned around.

Yo mama so stupid, she
thought Delta Airlines
was a sorority.

Yo mama so stupid,
when your dad said it
was chilly outside,
she ran outside with
a spoon.

Yo mama so stupid, she
called the 7-" to see
when they closed.

Yo mama so stupid,
when someone said
"Take the trash out,"
she moved.

Yo mama so stupid, she
thinks Christmas
Wrap is Snoop Dogg's
holiday album.

Yo mama so stupid, she
tried to drop acid but
the car battery fell
on her foot.

Yo mama so stupid, she
thinks Taco Bell is
where you pay your
telephone bill.

Yo mama so stupid, she
got fired from an
MSM factory for
throwing away all the
W's.

'SOII'CQ:

www.deeplake.comljo
kes/

www.mmon

THE 411

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"American
Hollow"

Rory Kennedy
defends her

film on
Appalachia l 3

 

 

 

The t rill of sweet victory

 

Winning ways

SGA President Jimmy Glenn and Vice President-elect Amanda Holloway de-stress in the Free Speech Area after they won yesterday's

SGA presidential election.

 

NICK TOHECEK I KERNEL STAFF

It's Glenn again: 1,767 students hit the polls,
Glenn secures second term by 296 votes

By Chris Markus
ASSISTANT ntwsz—R

After an exhaustive day of last minute campaigning, presiden-
tial candidate Jimmy Glenn was able to rest easy after winning his
second term as president of the student body.

A stoic Glenn was flanked by his vice presidential candidate.
Amanda Holloway and his sister. Kim. as the results of the vote
count were announced by Election Board Chair. Emily Boyd.

. .with 688 votes. (‘harmain Neal and Keisha Carter." said Boyd.

And with those words the Carter supporters erupted with cheers.

But the celebration was premature.

“And with 984 votes. Amanda Holloway and Jimmy Glenn.“
Boyd managed to say over the cheering (‘arter supporters.

Now it was the Glenn supporters turn to cheer.

Immediately after the announcement Glenn was greeted with
handshakes and hugs. but even as the Glenn-loyal shouted.
hollered. and cheered. Glenn remained calm and answered the
loud shouts with quiet "thank yous" to all who approached him.

“I can guarantee you that tomorrow morning I‘m going to be the
first person in the office...l‘m excited to get started," Glenn said.

After the crowd had settled Glenn and Holloway climbed on
top of the brick wall outside of the Student Center and gave ini-
promptu acceptance speeches that were riddled with emotion.

“You guys don‘t know how much this means to me." Glenn
said to the crowd.

Glenn went on to thank the student body. his campaign man»
ager and his sister. Kim.

Glenn said that as soon as he begins his second term he will
work to fulfill the promises enumerated in his platform.

He also said that the campaigning prior to the election has
brought new student concerns and problems to light that he is
looking forward to dealing with.

Glenn‘s mother. Cornelia. described her son as a natural for
the position.

“Jimmy has always liked to make a difference. he‘s always
been that way." she said.

Joe ()rtlett. an engineering sophomore. and Glenn's assistant
was not only glad to see his friend win the election. but also by
which the manner Glenn secured victory.

"It‘s good to see that a cleanly run czunpaign can win." ()rtlett said.

After Glenn had addressed the crowd. he descended from the
stone wall and was approached. once more. by individual students.

Even Rynara Murphy. a Carter supporter. shook Glenn‘s hand
and congratulated him.

Glenn said that after he left the Student Center he was plan-
ning on calling family and friends who he said were ”eagerly wait»
ing to hear the results.“

And as to his plans for the rest ofthe night:

smiling Glenn said.

“I‘m going to enjoy this and just celebrate it for what it is." a

 

Wand the bitter agony of defeat

By Tracy Kershaw
ASSISTANT NEWS EDITOR

There‘s always Germany.

Keisha Carter might have lost the
SGA presidential election. but she now has
bigger plans: to study abroad. possibly in
Germany, she said.

Carter. a political science and history
junior. tallied 688 votes to incumbent J im-
my Glenn‘s 984.

“We did the best we could. We ran a
true and fair campaign," Carter said. “We
tried to get the truth out there about what
has really gone on in student government."

A large contingent of family and
friends turned out at the free speech area
to support Carter and her running mate.
Charmaine Neal. a chemistry junior.

And while Glenn and his supporters
reveled in victory. Carter and her support-
ers still celebrated.

Carter and her Alpha Kappa Alpha
sorority sisters gathered in the grass.

singing harmoniously w ith arms inter-
twined in a circle of support.

Carter said she ran for SGA president
because of the things she has seen go on
over the past two years and because sever-
al students had asked her to run.

“Over the past two years. I‘ve seen
SGA disintegrate. Over this year. it just
seems like we've gotten away from the
purpose." she said. “I care about it so
much. and I didn't want to see that hap—
pening."

Every politician seems to have a lucky
charm. but Carter said she puts her faith
in a higher power: prayer.

“I‘ve left it up in God‘s hands. I prayed
about it for along time." she said while re-
laxing with her sister before the results
were announced.

She spent the election day handing out
handbills and praying.

“I have no rituals. Just more prayer: I
prayed that everything would go well.“

Carter‘s interest in SGA came before

she was even a student at UK Thel Lexing-
ton native and 1997 Henry (lay graduate
visited the SGA office before her freshman
year. Visiting the office made her really
excited about getting involved with stu-
dent government. (Tarter said.

Carter secured a freshman senator
seat her first year at UK. Her sophomore
and junior years. she was a senator at
large and headed the Appropriation and
Revenue committee.

Even though SGA has filled such a big
chunk of her college career. (Tarter has
many plans for her remaining years at UK.

"I want to get involved with other stu-
dent organizations. and I might study
abroad in Germany.” she said. “I might
leave for a semester. or even a year."

However Carter plans to spend her
time. she wants the students to do one
thing:

“Keep your eyes and ears on SGA and
make sure they are representing you at all
times." she said.

 

EMERIQNEILSL

New senators hope to

By Katie Nelsen
STAFF WRITER

While the president of SGA remains
the same. newly elected senators are still
hoping for change.

After just one year in SGA. freshman
senator at large winner. Tasha Neal. ran
for election because she felt there were
some changes to be made among the stu-
dent government.

“There were a lot of problems that
needed to be rectified." Neal said. “I feel
the leadership that was declared today will
keep us in the same cycle that we‘ve been in."

While focusing her role as senator at
large on parking issues and the alcohol
policy at UK. Amanda Lewis has some con--
oems about the trend in student government.

“At least we have a progressive Sen—

ate." Lewis said.

The re-election of president Jimmy
Glenn and his vice presidential running
mate. Amanda Holloway. have some new
senators looking for ways to make changes
to SGA. using the resources they have.

Jacquelynn Russell. first place winner
for senator at large. and second time in of-
fice. said in order for SGA to progress. it
must endure change.

“T feel the outcome is a little disap-
pointing because it's important that we
change.“ Russell said.

Despite the mixed feelings felt by some
senatorial winners. the 15 newly elected
senators at large and 15 new college sena-
tors are focused on beginning their role as
a voice for the students at UK.

“I want to try to make this campus as
student-friendly as possible." said Jay

NICK TOIECEK KENNEL STAFF

Eoiafort zone

Keisha Carter was consoled by her Alpha Kappa
Alpha sorority sisters after the loss yesterday.

 

make change in SGA

ally can't see how that relates to student

Varellas. a senator at large winner. "Stu-
dent government only exists to improve
student life on campus."

Varellas said SGA is important to the
welfare of UK students because it allows
students to have a voice and find answers
to their questions concerning university
issues.

“SGA has a lot of important decisions
to make about student life.“ Varellas said.

Varellas plans on tackling the tuition
issue and wants to provide students with a
clear explanation of why tuition is increas-
mg.

Student government at UK involves
senators from every college on campus,
These senators are available to bridge a
connection between students and universi-
ty administration.

“People think of fine arts and they re-

 

The Student Newspaper at the University of Kentucky, Lexington

government." said Mike Allen. (‘ollege of
Fine Arts senator. "Maybe there's some
way we can get a little more involvement
from the students in fine arts."

Aside from the opportunity to repre-
sent his college. Allen feels that running
for SGA was a personal victory. as Well.

“I think of this as something I really
needed." Allen said. “Just putting my
name out and taking the risk was a chal-
lenge."

Patrick Robinson. senator for the (‘ol-
lege of Agriculture. wants start off his re~
sponsibilities as college senator by spread-
ing his name throughout the college.

“I want to get around to all the clubs
in the agriculture college to let them know
that I'm available." Robinson said. “I‘m
here for the students."