xt7s7h1dkn93 https://exploreuk.uky.edu/dips/xt7s7h1dkn93/data/mets.xml University of Kentucky Fayette County, Kentucky The Kentucky Kernel 19541217 newspapers sn89058402 English Contact the Special Collections Research Center for information regarding rights and use of this collection. The Kentucky Kernel The Kentucky Kernel, December 17, 1954 text The Kentucky Kernel, December 17, 1954 1954 2013 true xt7s7h1dkn93 section xt7s7h1dkn93 J

m
-

.
j"-Wi-

fear

ht.

teeth you have.
It's downright
amaiing the varirly of people
that almost become human
even the
an unil I hristma
Krrni'l stalf which wishes all the
alumni, faculty, and student a
what Ion
Santa Claus!

u
I

Christinas Message

My.

p
".'

i'?-''--

in thr umr country shepherds abiding In thr
field, kerping watch nvrr thrir Hock by nijslit. And. In. thr angrl
I ctd camr upon thrtn, and thr (lory of thr Lord shnnr about
of thr
thrm: and thry wrre sore afraid. And thr angrl said unto them.
not for. brhold, 1 brine you Kood tidings of great joy, which
shall br to all the proplr. lor unto you is born this day In thr city
or David a Saviour, whirh is Christ thr Lord. And this shall br a
sign unto you; yr shall And thr babr wrapped in swaddling 'rlnthrs.
lying in s manger.'" (Luke 2:8-1"And

Greeting

sXv

Su v

S--

thrrr wrrr

V...

'
,

tar

very MF.RKY CHRISTMAS.

Santa Unity
l)vesn'l this young lady have a
blocking if shr had a
stocking. Just thr kind Santa wantf all young girls to havr. Little
Christmas scenes likr this certainly warm thr old gentleman
well-fille-

Vol. XIA'I

niversity of Kentucky, Lexington. Kv.. Fridav, Dec. 17,

No Drinking Rule
Discussed By SGA

''leraM

For l'ay
p

licxrts
cussion
tula ol
week.

or' tin- -

tin-

controversy ovtr Satnrilav classes and a (lis-- ;
nilc at atlilctic evrnts toiipcil the
Student Covcrninent Association ineetiiii' tliis

tin- -

Ileports tiom ail ol tlie colleges ly S(', rejireseiitatix cs aiul
r intormat i ti: supplied ly tlie administration added more
fuel to tin- - much discussed Saturday class controversy.
Ken Harris.' chairman ol the ronimtiun with thr I'nivrrsity.
SGA committor on Saturday class- The assembly representative was
cs, told the assembly thai Dean rf told that 20 per cent of students
- at UK are from Jefferson County
Men Leslie U Martin .said tlie emSaturday classes and 20 per rent are from Lexini;- of
phasizing
could result in more students ton and nearby areas. From this,
campus over wrek- - he Judged that from 41 to 50 per
staying on the
cent ol the students miRht be Rone
ends.
"'e
Harris n,m"l TJran Martin as ovtr c,as'' wketuls under the pies-als- o
setup
stating that thr I niversity
H'"ns reported that Or Hob( rt
reels that students mighi receive
more benefits from thr plannrd so- - L. Mills, University lUKislrar, said
"Continued on Page 8'
rial rvrnts and might br In closer

3, 4

and

I'rhruary
Check may b r
signrd ror on Jan. 24. 25. 2S, 27.
and 28, sinc e school will not br
in session thr first week or February.
March 1. 2. 3. 4, and until
12:30 p.m. on the fifth.
April 7. unlit 12:30 p.m. on
thr second. 4. and 5.
May i. X 4. and 5.
June

fnrtlu

p.m. on

heart.

Parties Split

.Alust Sijrn
IJv Jan. .1

Thr payroll signing schrdulr
for thr rrmaindrr of this srmrs- ter includes:
January

By RAY HORNBACK

No. 12

and until
thr fourth.
1. 2, 3.

12:30

10 SGA Seats
r

By JIM CRAWFORD

flettirns Iroin Wednesday's Student ( a riiini nl Association
lections sliow an even split lictwcen tlie ( .'oiistitutiunalists and
L'niled Students, cacli parts sinninii five scats. Last ear the
K .'oust Notionalists
";.iined a
majority.
'otilit was li'lit. Only I. H2 1):illnls were i ast ly tlie si
c lniusiii'4 repi esent.il
s. IIowcmt. iih iiiIm is i( tlie S(I
two-.sea-

turn committee

s.nd this was

not unusual for a fall election
All the winnrrs carried
their
rues hy sirahle majorities. One
Kill Killilrr, I nilrd Mocandidate.
di ills U prrc lassman.
was re -elected. Hill Moody, thr other in-

cumbent running, was drfrated by
Constitutionalist Charles Yancry.

N.i'.e of the 8TJA offices was ac
st;,kc this semester They Will be
contotcd in the sprint ol thr 19.r)4-:ih.nil ear At the same lima
of the
the ri'iiiaiiuiin
as cnibly members will br elected.
A brcakdoun of thr individual
races follows:
Arts and Sciences: Chip Rice,
US InwrrclHssman drfrated J T.
Fraiikcnbcrver. Const lowerclass-inaliill Hilliter. US upicr( lass-iill deleuted liob Hulue. Const.
u)ercliis.sn:iiil. Marcie Uiirman.
Const loweiriasswoman. defeated
Kav Marterstack. US lowerclass-iin Hettv Jo Martin. Const

two-thir-

Sjniiitaif (Brrrtiiuui

fK'rij sliulctit and si manlier of the 'nit crsi'r.
i luiiiy holiday scawn a ijoii Icaic the campus
tir
time.
he u ilh your family and friends at Chrlt-nato
I

u isli

We hope tltat..ijou aill lane a joyous Christmas and
that the cic Year n ill lirinu you are at happiness and contentment. Merry Christmas and happy eu Year to tjvii

all'
HutMAN

AM) Ni

's. 's

nl)
ts5-sfc!v-

A
La
Double Congratulation

Are In (fnler

Der Shinnick, prrsidrnt of thr Constitutionalist Party, and Matt
Frank, president of I lilted Students, congratulate each other after
their candidates won live seats each in thr S( A election Wednesday.

saT''vk

'sl

sa,

deflated

Louise

Wliltt. US upieiclassoiiian.
Agriculture: Hoy Gibson. Const,
lowerclassmail. deteated Garnett
Bradford. US lowerclassman. Charles Yancey. Const umM' laxsmuu;

dclealed

Hill

M.xxlv.

man
Coiniii'icd on

na4

I'S

lKr

UM'I-tin-

7i
''

Drive Carefully On Your Trip Home

* 2

TIIK KENTUCKY KERNEL. Fridav. IW. 17. KM

Kfxitlrnoe Hall
Have Pa jama I'artirs

WBKY Broadcasts Feu I lire
Christmas Operas, Music

Kx-Kern-

(riven Japan Duty

of residence hall's Christ- festivities, pajnma parties;
were held In Jewell Hall. Monday;
Bovd Hall, Tuesday; Barracks 2.
Wednesday; and Putt Hall, and
f
Barracks 1 and 3. Thursday.
As

mas

part

WliKY, lTniversity student radio station, will cancel nearly
regular programs from Dec. 17 to Jan. 3 in order to
Chorale.
present its annual program operas and Christmas music.

all of its

Ionard Press, program supervisor, aald the station will hold
over from Us regular schedule only
I K's basketball game and two
programs. Tho I nirersitT of Ken- tuck Roundtable" and "The Best
f BBC."
Monday nights. Christmas music
be played until 7 30 p.m., when
Roundtable Is broadcast. After
the Roundtable the special broad- casts will begin.
Hmidays. the special broadcasts
will be heard before "The Best of
BHC" which is aired at 8 p m.
The plan for other nights rail
for broadcasting of the programs
immediately after signing on the
air at 6 p an. Any time left after
the above programming will be
filled with appropriate music.
O.

Diofrnr

Allrn

Allen Wins'
Scholarship
Allen,

Diogenes

graduate,

lrl

Friday. Dec. 24 MESSIAH by Handel. The Liverpool
Other special programs for the Philharmonic Orchestra. Saturday.
holidays ar the broadcasts of the Dec. 25 Christmas Carols. TradiUK Invitational Tournament on tional.
Sunday, Dec. 26 LA THAVIATA
'Dec 21 and 22. The complete
whedule for the holidays follows: by Verdi. Toscaninl with Licia
Jan Peerce, and Robert
Friday, Dec. 17 REQUIEM by
Verdi. Directed by Toscanlnl. Sat-wi- ll Merrill. Monday. Dec. 27 CARby Bizet. FrIU Reiner with
Kentucky v. Tem-th- e MEN
urday. Dec. 1
pie; Johann 6trauss Operettas. Rise Stevens. Jan Peerce, Licia
Sunday. Dec. 19 LA BOHEME by f Albanese, and Robert Merrill.
Tuesday. Dec. 18 THE BARBER
Puccini. Toscaninl with Licia Ai- OF SEVILLE by Rossini. Milan
banese and Jan Peerre
Monday. Dec. M THE C REA-- I
TIOM by Haydn. Hung by Vienna
Chorus with Orchestra. Tuesday,
Dec. 11 I K Invitational
atent. Wednesday, Dee . 22 I K

Invitational Tournament.
Thursday. Dec. 23 Christmas
Carols sung by the Robert Shaw

.student From tin University in

tlif last IS years to receive one
of the coveted Khodcs Scholarships for tvo years study at
(Ktord University in England,
Allen, now graduate studrnt at
Prinrrtoo. vat arlrrUd by the
Grral LakA Committee of Scholar- ship Award In Chicago last Satur- day. He graduated aith a drfree
in philosophy from x K and received the Sullivan
Medallion
awarded to outstanding students.
TM last student to get this
award from the University was

Floyd Cammack in 1953 who is
now in England.
AUen
is at
Princeton on a two-yescholar- ship now and will not begin his
.study in England until October,

V
y

EVERYONE

ENDS UP AT

'JERRY'S-

ill

y
if

405 S. LIME
ACROSS FROM SUB

IL PAGLIAC

...

BOOK STORE

We send our sincere good wishes
to oil of our friends ond
patrons
we Huppe this Yuletide
finds you well and happy.. . .

KENNEDY

Saturday, Jan.

CI by Leoncavallo. La Bcala Open
Company, Chorus, and Orchestra,
Sunday, Jan. 2 BORIS OODOU.
NOFF by Moussorgsky. Bung b
Boris Chrlstoff.

ft
ft

Dee. 29 1L TROVATORE by Ver
dl. Robert haw Choral and RC
Victor Orchestra.
Thursday. Dec. 30 UK t. St.
Louis; a program of waltzes. Fri
day. Dec. 31 Music tor the Neve.
Year: New Year party.

Engineer's Supplies

Orchestra and Chorus. We dpeadar,

Text Books
School Supplies

Jack Sorrelle Jr., editor of thd
has been as.
Kernel In 1947-4sinned to overseas duty in Japan
as a captain In the Air Force,
He was formerly a reporter for
thellnclnnati Post.

ACTIVITY CALENDAR

the 'second

Editor

Jerry's Drive In

357 South Lime
Curb Service
11:00 a.m. to 1:00 a.m.

East Main at Walton
Curb Service
1:00 a.m. to 1:00 p.m.

MENS WEAR

NEVER

New filter cigarette brings
flavor back to filter smoking!

"V.

ITWTVTAT
t

Winston tastes good-li- ke
a cigarette should!
Now there's a filter smoke
college men and women can really
enjoy! It's Winston. the new,
king-sizfilter cigarette with real
flavor full, rich, tobacco flavor!

lyy-"m-

You're bound to enjoy Winston's
finer flavor. And you're sure to
appreciate Winston's finer filter.
This exclusive filter is unique,
different, truly suj trior! It works
so effectively
yet doesn't "thin"
the taste. Winstons are king-sizfor extra filtering ad ion.
too t lure's rio
elioi t to pu!'! '

I.,

!nston.:fi

Kasy-drawii.-

-4

Try a pack of Winstons the filter
cigarette that brings flavor back
to filter smoking!

WINSTON...

ifo?

easy-drawin- g

filter cigarette!
H.

HtvKOLD

TOBACCO

W'NITON

IiLIM,

* THE KENTITKY KERNEL Friday,
ymmm

mar

'
'

.,",

GIURGEVICH

SHOE

....

Of.

17.

REPAIR

rclined, rfiniikd, cuff,
Leather )cketfl
waistbands, iippr.
KEYS MADE WHILE YOU WAIT
117 S. Lima at IwM

the case
of the
stuck-u- p

salesman

Cosmopolitan Club Holds Dlruwr
Ten different foreign dishes, prepared hy foreign
students from different countries, made up the
menu at the annual "International Dinner" sponsored by the t osmopnlitan Club. The dinner was

h.ili-nl.ir
tl cy
When puliic arrivr'l at lt:c iv..-g.
sli'Hik llicir lirjfls i:i rlM-ln-f- .
lustra' of U ink; gauged
a:il I" 'i i ml. thr s.i'.' -- iii.iii as a t.iailv f ' i r' Min.r.
'1 li' V li' L CjllK Is s. i k (1 l! c ( 111 s
t'i rp.it,
. . .1" rnipn

jrvcral

CKld

rniptv

sli"w-cas-

il)l

shit

at the First Methodist Church at 6:r.ft p.m.
Saturday. Dr. Thomas ( lurk, head of the I K his- Ury deparln.ent, discussed his recent trip to India
and other countries in the Far last.
hi-l- d

slijJird

pim--

of clcih

an empty

i.i-l-

s.ii" iii ;ilml. an
dialer. Ii.giimms

(it
"Lei; clul)," said the sal(niar, still all stiuk-ustuck ; n. ratlirr.
iili In it w.itrr and
lirn tliry finallv got dim rxtrirat'-rand said. "Ul.al s t'ie
chisel In- tliai.krd il.cm nin-l"
matter vsiili you jerks' haven't
''Nil." Iir explained. "I was simply making a Ieinonstra-t- '.
shirt
in of the Van Hrusrn
niir nt the
1kjs. Showrd thrm why thr rev "hiiiunai v
t
C entury collar just mm I urnllr t;ti.
Ink 'rm hoss regular collars are made of thrrr lavrrs of iloth. "ghird'.'
and stiti hrd together. I glurd a t. iust lur emphasis . .
learnrd to demonstrate in Woolwnnh's."
' Grt on with it." said tlie drtrctivr.
jobs wrinkle and
"Well, I showed 'em how thrsr
wilt quickly even with starch or stavs. I said the
Van Hrusrn Century collar would stay nrat nl:m
without starch or stavs or thrir money baik. When I
told cm that Van Hrusrn Century Base 'em lots more
vrar than ordinary shirts, yet cost the same price just
S V'5 for whites and J4.50 for colors) they Imughi mr out.
I was so overjoyed. I did a little jig and trfpprd ovr.r the
g'.Ue Hlt. Ciot Stuck Up."
' Oh. rah?" ycahrd the detective. "Well, wherr's all
the douch'"
''Oh. collrge men never far. They just charge everything
to Dad."
(Editor's note: Oh. yeah?)
(

Ix-r-

UK Faculty Adopts Report
Concerning Cheating On Exams
By YVONNE EATON
;
Tlie UK Faculty lias adophil a report on
n exams
at tlie University calling for:
1. More cmpliasis on daily work and less importance on the
mid-terand final examinations..
2. Matuin' of classes in sncli a way tliat it will "pay" to
Ik honest.
t emphasis
in exams on broad knoulcdue rather
3. 1'lai.i:.
than the t'ivitr.i hack of factual information.
The Faculty recommended that
the report, prepared by the Schol- institutions with a lar?e and hetarship Committee, be distributed erogeneous student body.
4. Some Mucents
believe that
to all the acuity and staff and
that It be dcusied in depart employees of the University have
been instrumental in a few cases
mental meet::tThe UK Faculty asked for the ".' leaking" test materials
o. fatudents emphasize that the
report last .siinr.a as a result of
SUA discussions on the honor sys- faculty member should be interested in elimmata'.g all forms of
tem and cheating on exams.
dishonesty
in connection
Pres. II. L. Donovan appointed exams, not only to insure thatu.ith
his
the Scholarship Committee to be marks are fairly distributed, but
responsible for the report. In
also to discharge h;s responsibility
IS students were appointed
for promotina good character and
by the Deans of Men and Women
among stuhiKh
to assist the committee in prepar- dents. moral standards
ing the report.
Suggestions mace to the students
Three meetings were held let were
Ad
spring to study the .situation.
1. Continue
the effort to en- - '
ditional meetings were held this courage honesty on exams,
1UII.
2. If study indicates an honor
The report, submitted to the
tlit-atiii"-

K acuity, la not compulsory, but is
divided into sections on observations, suggestions to students, and
xuggestions t faculty and staff.
Some of the observations made
were:
1. The problem i broader than
the single ,iue of honesty on
exams.
2. Student opinion is divided as
to the advisability of an honor
.

3. Chiatir.j In classes is not a
more seriou- - priblem than it has
for son.e time, und it is no
more prevalei.M-.erthan In most
e

system is desirable, promote it with
the understanding that the faculty,
individually and collectively, stands
ready to lend assistance in every
way possible.
3. The campus leadership should
take a, firm stand publicly in favor
of a high code of honor and integrity among students.
Members of the Srholarshin
Committee are Dr. Leo Chamber- ain chairman. Prof. C. E.
hart. Dr. L. W. Croft. Dr. J. M.
England. Miss Chloe Oifford. Dean
n
Sarah B. Holmes, Dean L. L.
tin, Dr. L. E. Meece. Prof. F. J.
Prindl, Dr. E. P. Slone. Dean D.

if-pn.-

Terrrll. and Dr. Ruth E. Tho:r.a.
Students assisting the committee were Joan Albaugh. Sue
Coburn BUirkerby. John Y.
Brown. Jr.. Mildred Cronin. Kave

Bec-wit-

Boldberg. William Harding. Polly
Keller. Wendell Norman.
Ann
O'Roark. Charles Palmer. Diana
Parr. Glen Sandefur. Deborah
Schwarz. and Patricia Wuthnaton.

The word veto means "I forbid."
Americas first billionaire was
John D. Rockefeller.
Texas A. and M. college furnished more officers to the Army
in World War II than did West
Point.

(

isn't too lair
to got just the right v
(jrifts at
fr
i

PurcelT

Barn-syste-

Mar-bee-

Our selection of gifts is huge, and you have
lots of time to make the perfect choice!
We've planned and schemed and made a lot
of special purchases. WeVe turned or whole
store into a fabulous Gift Bazaar, bursting
with warm-hearte- d
Christmas offerings at
small, sensible prices. We chose each
one for its charm, its quality, its utility,
and its giftworthiness." Come with your
list . . this is where a MERRIER
WRISTMAS begins!
:

R7w

Our Christmas Spirit
Lasts All Year Long
I

yuur

(hrisima,

(

ityJ

* THE KENTUCKY 'KERNEL. Friday.

.Tr.

17.

.r.l

IVs Time To Go Modern
University i)f Kentucky is K"'"R to
li;ivc Saturday classes next semester. Wr
t lim't kiuv how many students will Ik- afy
tin" enforcement of tlie rulini;
fected ly
vliicli came from tin office of Dean M. M.
Miite of tlie College of Arts and Sciences.
That information will le available only when
the new schedules are printed and distribTin-

uted
as it now stands, is fairly,
White has said he's enforcini;
simple. Dean
2111 old ruling
to lighten class burdens which
fall on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.
1'ossible improvements which might come
nlxint under the enforcement have come
from Dean of Men Leslie I.. Martin. Dean
lil Women Sarah 15. Holmes, and Vice President I co M. J i,i nl M'i la in.
These olfioials believe Saturday classes
might make possible: better school spirit;
bi tter utilization of classroom space; better
education for students-- and'1ettir social
y
benefits for all students (presumably
social functions).
The Kernel has several objections to an
increase of Saturday classes and Saturday
classes in general. The first objection is that
sill I k' HOTC units will hold their review
parades on Saturday.
This means that a lot of students who
The situation,

Uni-rrsit-

count

on"

Saturday employment .will

knocked out of work. In our opinion, thwse
review parades aren't that all fired import-- '

ant.
This all ties in with another aspect of
the same angle student employment. The
I'nited States is not an aristocracy. We accept the fact that some people drive 19.1S

vintage jalopies and that others buy a new
six months.
foreign model
If the University doesn't at least adjust it- -'
self to allowing working students to arrange
their schedules to let them work, the University is neglecting its primary duty to 'offer
an education to every man and woman who
seeks one.
As we hac mentioned before (after others
brought the matter up for discussion)', there
work
is no justification for enforcing a
period for students and faculty. If the trend
week, the Unihas been toward the five-da- y
versity might do well to leave the horse and
buggy days to catch up with the times.
The Student Government Association lias
done an excellent job in regard to the Saturday class enforcement. Although one Higher-Hp
lalteled the group's work as immature
this week, we take the opposite view. For
the first time in a long time, SGA memlicrs
have cooperated in their committee work
and. have done some valuable research, because the Kernel has been charged with reby the
porting SGA affairs inaccurately
we point out that the Assame Higher-l'sembly meetings are open to every student.
We'll start printing the meeting times.
SGA. if it decides that Saturday classes by
enforcement or in themselves are undesirable1, can go through the "proper channels"
to attempt to have something done.
It can go to Dean White first. Next it can
present .the issue to the Faculty. If this
doe sn't work out, it can see the board of
Trustees. Whatever the results. SGA can be
proud of having tried to the best of its
six-d;-

Not Guts

SlowrSense

Most of us w ill be leaving school for home
today with more than two weeks of wonderful vacation time IVforc us. This is the time
l year when we look forward to leing with
our fainilics, to seeing old friends, to enjoying tlie leisure of home and of celebrating.
The only sad part almnt it is that some of
lis won't le coming back.
Dying is easy, being killed is even easier.
Much easier when roads are wet or covered
vitli snow and ice. Easier yet when alcohol
is mixed with gasoline and when the driver
.sees every caution as la vie en rose.
It can happen to anyoYw at anytime. It
only takes h .moment.
I'lay it stupid if you want to make it a
iiick death. Take a corner over 50 miles an
hour and let your friends discuss how you
looked with your head sliced oil neatly by a"
telephone pole.
I'ass in a no passing zone and let the state
jvilice get another color picture of a driver
vitli a steering wheel post jammed through
bi chest.
Don't dim your lights uiavbe you'll get a
kick when you look around after the crash
and see a splinter of steel jutting out of your
friend's skull if you live.
Speed up when someone tries to pass
looks diflercut when you're trying
you-li- fe
to crawl out of a ditch with a splintered pel- is. crushed ribs, and broken arms and legs.
People say serious accidents leave uu interesting impression.
One moment you're speeding along as
coc ky as a two-bi- t
nadictator in a two-acrtion. The next moment you're wondering
why it takes so long to apply the brakes
and then why you're hurt'r.g so much and
vliy there's silence all around you.
The people sitting next to you can have a
good, time, too.
sk them how they froze as they saw the
car approaching the utility Kile.
Ask them if they're still alive-ho- w
it felt
as they sat there wondering how much time
there was between life and nothing.
e

man ow cuSre

imu

And yim can always have the consolation
of coming out of a wreck unhurt but with
the guy in the other car dead or mangled.
This is really pleasant if you we re ;rt fault,
or drunk, or just jilain stupid.
Gar accidents don't do much for your
vanity.
Safety glass might not shatter, but it can
lea e your face looking like raw hamburger.
Knobs and gadgets on the elashlxiard can
gouge as nice a hole in a skull as you ever
saw.
Splintered lames raise havoc with your
complexion when they sick out of your
torn, bleeding flesh.
Don't le a fool. P;p!.'y your sense instead of vour guts.
T

Some iriivcrsitics exist to educate people.
Others exist to turn out ouiig people who
will in turn send their children to the same
university to be' turned out for the same
reasons they were.

Tlie Kentucky Kernel
U.MVKRSirV

OF'KtNTl'tKY

Entered at the Port Office at lexington. Kentucky, aa
second class matter under the Act itt March 3. 1879,
durmc
eublilid weekly and school except holidays
enains.
$100 per aemeiter
SUBSCRIPTION RATES

Ronnie Butler
Editor
Managing Editor
Debbie Schwarg
Assistant Managing Ed.
Barbara Morgan
Ken Litchfield
News Editor
Society Editor
Aim O'Roorlc
Tom Preston
Feature Editor
George Koper
Sports Editor
Tom Wiiborn
Business Manager
Advertising Manager
John Glover
Jane Cole
Solicitor
Sally Cornell
Circulation Manager
Don Henry
Campus Circulation
Dave Nakdimen
Cartoonist
Roy Homback, Thornton Wright and
Bill Billlter
Columnists
EDITORIAL BOARD
Ronnie Butler
Ann O'Roark
Ray Hornbaclc
Don Ht'iiry
...-

Reporter and copy dek Anne Beard; Nancy Paul;
Sonny ( ombi: Tracy Walden; Yvonne Ealove-M- ai
y
Kane; Judy Bolder; Balbara MorK.in; Virginia Hnod-ras- i;
Bill Billlter; Peri v Ahlilev; Betty Boles; HUnce
Hnnhona. James Crawford, Kiln Easterly; Hov Cilass;
Woodiow Hall; BUI Henry. Bub llowertou; Donald
n;
Betty Jo Martin; Eliasa May; Carl Mureland:
Phvtlis Huers; Chritlie Vandersnft; Elisabeth Auer-nath- y;
Barbara Bemamin; Kay Uliiicue; James Buldine;
Aierv Jenkins; Shu ley Kaidale; Hub Spradlin; Bill
Burleson: Bill Surface; Tied Jvhnsvu; Eugene Marvin,
and William Randolph Worst.

". . . 48 (um wrappers, 12 cigarette butts, 8 orange peeling, and
3 vole in this one. If you ask me, there hasn't been enough student Interest In SGA this year."

Factory

R-- H
By RAT IIORNBAC'K

v Fred

Alfraido, you
look as if you're in pain.
Alfraido There's nothing you
can do, Fred. Just leave me in
misery. I'll suffer alone.
Fred Now, Alfraido, don't do me
In like that. I want to be the old
dad to you in your time of misery.
Alfraido Maybe you're right. I
need to tell
someone my
troubles. Fred,
anM I
I'm lonely. No
one ever notices me in a
crowd. I can

the Friend

never

attention

attract

and

I lead a miserable life. My

.standing
dropped

has

3.88.

Fred Daddy O, we've got to
do something about your problem!
I've got it! I've got it!
Alfraido But Fred, there's nothing you can do.
Fred Ves, there is. Just do
what I tell you and you'll be
the hit of the party you'll
be livin', man!
Alfrai'jo Nothing will help me.
Fred Now you listen to me.
You move right down to the nearest threadery and get covered with
the weaviest black and pink. Then
head right (or the grill you know
where all the lassies who are
working on their Magna Com Lad
hang out.
Alfruido But what'li I do when
I get there?
Fred Don't worry, man.
All
you'll need is a pocket full of cftSli.
Spread it around lavishly.' piuy
records, buy cokes, and really live
it up. 'Man. those dumes will treat
you like a king!
Well now, Alfraido had reached
the point where he would try anything. He got draped oops he
was suited up in a pink suit with
s blark shirt and a pink tie. And
he proceeded to dash right over to
that fabulous drn of evil, the grill.
He spent his money lavujy and
soon became the idol of the tender
gender. Even the he men had to
admire such a
But alack and alas, he got It in
the pocket. Alfraido ran out of
money. And with the dropping of
his last coin, Alfraido was dropped
by the young maidens.
No longer was he their pet. No
longer did they treat him with
n,

glad to aid Alfraido in his quest of
lame.
He suggested that Alfraido give
gilts to everyone on campus.
Alfraido took this suggestion to
heart. He sold his car. pawned his
clothes, books, pogo Mirk, mouthwash, and snuff box, and sold two
of his three pints of blood.
With the money he received
t$.'i9.89. he bought a Santa suit
and many fire presents.
He delivered to the home of
President Donovan a bouquet of
flowers, with a note which said,
"We wish you a speedy recovery.
Hurry bark."
To the Kernel he presented &
copy of Dale Carnelgie's
book,
"How to Win Friends and Influ-enPeople."
To Maintenance and Operations,
he gave a book entitled. "Better
Campus and Gardens Advice on
How to Tear Down a Fence."
To the 2.000 or so BOTC students, he gave a copy of the latest
song hit, "I Love m Parade, When
It's not on Saturday."
To Ray Hornback went a ticket
to Siberia. (He was only kidding.
To Debbie Schwartz. Kay Goldberg, Sue Ann Hobgood, Elizabeth
Bell. Sally Maggard, Ann O'Roark.
Ann Futrell, and Nannie Black
went roses for their outstanding
achievements .on campus.
To Charles Palmer went congratulations on the fine and sincere way In which he has handled
SUA and IFC.
Alfraido now felt that he belonged. But he had one more gift'
for everyone which could not be
bought with all of the money in
tlie parking violations accumulation. And that is a tremendous
MKRRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!
(Will anyone who knows anything about spatial warps and
atomic hyperdrtves please contact
Kay Hornback. Luna Station C9-Milky Way, Solar Sysiom? Information urgently needed. KH. I
ce

Parallel
Marriage, so we are told, is ft
State of bliss. So is Ignorance.

free-spend-

admiration.

Alfraido again found himself a
nobody a little man on campus.
He was a sad lad, tor the adora- tion which he had received had
inflated his ego tremendously. Alfraido was no longer, satisfied with
beiug a wallflower, a buffoon, and
as the always-lrft-oparty.
8o back to Fred the Friend went
Alfraido with his tale of woe.
Now Fred, being the typical
friendly college Joe. was more than

Exaggeration?
If IFC passes on the recommendation tin t any event in which
10 per cent of a fraternity participates be counted as a scheduled social function, we foresee tlie
cards bearing number
1U
instead of names.

Sour Pi
Fraternities and sororities, when
they meet criticism about reslric-lio- n
clauses, begin harping on the
fine old theme of traditions whic h
are as "American as apple pie."
.Is that why they .cxll themsoive
Greek?

* THE KENTITKY KFKNKI.. FtMnr. Der. 17. 1KI

The Asluin

Yule Spirit Comes To Keeper Why is it this Way

In the construction vstauc of
PRISTON
Memotial Coliseum wotkmen
t!tr tlunt in ii
,t to Mnd a way to combat tl.c hotl
in
'irtnlrv tltithu
uilli Mmitti ninu i
conditions and underground
'tail ( lj( mfi.iiM
caves which existed around where
There are limes on campus for the building was to lie tal-- i d 11 v
one reason
to keep student' had to have a Rood foundation
Irom cutting across lie lawns unit
The next difficulty was trying tit
eating down the mass This would cope with Kentucky's udd
wratlur
create dirt and nv.id paths
whiih causes much expansion aihI
Now that the old question nl i unl 41 Imciiivf
materials whrnrer
"wl.j Ii'iaes' has been an-- i nd we hate
arnld or hid sp. II. It
t
us t iv t.j explain M and
st ems that because of Hie orallo r.
on this subject.
one of
slightly
In (he first pl.ire, I K doesn't and the the walls mines
movement creates breaks
.
want a campus covered with
hi the roof.
Blent. Trier ll
A'lother ieMin for the lout's
Suddenly the Keeper
hi
eunuch
want
kla wn to the aeta'e (x im '1.
imiso'ious compo-i'lot- i
and went tc
.Vwalkwa
for ,s that bullet hole-- , have lx
!he Irosttd window He had heim!
t, ' g students to usi- - IoiiihI In the rncif These wt:c
f
-mu.-i- r
music ;.trai Li
oin
from piohahlv caused
L
c
"1
ol Tile Asvlum He iieered-ouin
S I building In liiid a run which when nm d
m turn mihI
'
toward the moon-li- t
snow.
fk
(Vl- the pio'c tile toward the
I nerrliirr, M
There, slaiidna: r.ght In front
e
emu's lop
he sluts tut into
O builds sideil his di crcpid home, wile twenty
loof rid In
ol their force t:ie
w here
or thirty heautiful
walks
Thcv
ooerihi: yielded and broken opi o.
llirv and other
'.vere holding little red candle-!M!repair hv the wav. have
were
officials bellrir made and a trv lor "mi nuini e
carols
Their voices sounded like a chou
would best and t luht icss ' in the top is ticiv.ir
ol impels, and the candles resere all.
i hecked.
Secondly. M and O realizes with
flected the kind smiles on
Two
anhave
others that everyone can't Ih' satis- swered we hoe"i coin eiiuiiK M
For the lu-- t time in his eii fied. Tins is an msolvable piob-lc- and O
fnr t
hie the Keeper could find nothing
final article will complete ear
The walks though, are built with mission of trying lo understand
to scorn about. With a tortured
conscience he remembered his bit- these factors m mind nece sity, the Maintenance Hvpartmrnl. gie
ing messages, mid he bowed his convenience, beauty, and the bud. il a lillle publicity, and acquaint
head in shame. long after the get.
sludenls with some of I K secg
Hoihtig it down to a few points, tional problems.
had left, the
Keeper Mood looking nut of the the fences are here to stay T all
window. He thought, "they aren't except one by the Journalism
Building
so bad aTter all."
After an electrical underground
The following Friday morning
everyone on campus was shocked distribution is completed and some
to see the Keepers message. For diguing is finished near the JourDean Frank J. Welch of the Collo. and behold, not one word of nalism Building, the little house lege of Agriculture and Home Ecobeside the Mining Lab. which is nomies will deliver the last of n
criticism was written on it.
electrical vault", will be series of three speeches to the KenThe simple message had only termed
torn down.
this to say:
tucky Extension Workers ConferThen, old faithful, or fitful, the ence which is meeting on the camASYL
M WISHES fence, will be replaced by a side"THE
pus this week.
EVERYONE A JOYFl'L CHRIST- walk. It. will be an asset to all
Monday he spoke to a prelimistudents who have classes on both nary session dealing with the
MAS!"
sides of the Journalism Building. Kenturky Farm and Home DeTheir hike around will certainly be velopment Program. Dean Well Ii,
shortened.
who is also director of Agriculture
The project should start early Fxiieriment Station, spoke yestc
next semester.
at a general .session of the
Why does the Coliseum have conference on "Meeting the Chalbe liquidated. Through contacts in
'
such a bad roof?
lenge in Kentucky."
the underground. Duck Soo atThis question certainly deserves
tempted to escape to South Korea.
Dean Welch will be the last
He was smuggled abroad a fis